Rising all over again

I know its been long and I won't bother about the details. I just did not post. Its as simple as that.

Initially I did not actually miss blogging. Infact it was peaceful for somedays. Not waiting for a comment for my post, not being curious about what other person might have posted.... no such thoughts running through my mind and it was all cool...

Until one day I realized blogging can be your best friend. You can dump ANY of your thoughts here without having to worry about how the other person might feel.

And so I am back. Not in the best of my moods today so won't say much. But will surely be more regular from now on :)

New Blog and other things.

Well, I know it’s been some time and most of you have been waiting for some updates about my son, but I have to confess I have become a lazy bum!
It would be wrong if I say I didn’t get time because of my son … (touch wood) he has been a very good boy till now. He doesn’t get cranky at all, and sleeps well during the night which is a blessing I am sure many mothers would agree. I have just been plain lazy. Being in mom’s house doesn’t help either. You get to order around and get pampered all at the same time ;-)
Now that two months are over since my son was born I have decided to wake up finally. Have to get back to not-being-lazy mode soon.

I have decided to start a separate blog to write about my son. Want to keep this one general. So here it is. It’s not too difficult to guess that updates on the other blog will be more than here ;-) but still I would want to keep this one to write about my general feelings and comments on happenings around me.

I have been reading reports of racism in Australia. I do agree that those have to be condemned and the Aussie police have to really wake up and take appropriate measures. But I cant stop myself but ask the question.. we raise all hue and cry when “others” (read foreigners) discriminate us, but don’t we do the same? We may not attack and kill but I am sure our “treatment” is no less traumatic. How many tourists have had a “safe” and “deceit-less” trip to India? Mysore boasts of quite a few foreign students. Palestinians, Africans, Chinese etc.., Ask them how many times they have been teased in public not only in their college campus but in general on road, in busses etc.
How can we ever forget our “casteism”? Isn’t it racism with a different name? Forget about inter-caste marriages, that’s a different topic altogether. But let us just look at our daily lives. How many of us allow maids to come inside the kitchen? How many of us readily eat in our neighbor’s house if they are of a different caste? I can go on and on... but I am sure you get the point. So before pointing fingers at other countries, let us first look at ourselves. First clean your house before dusting your neighbor’s house! I am sure there is no less “groupism/favoritism/casteism” in our own universities. Have we even given a thought to it? I am sure we would be the biggest market for fairness creams. What with our obsession to be fair. How many dark girls get good grooms easily? I think we better clean our house first before trying to clean our neighbor’s house! (I have to mention a kannada saying here “Avara yelili heggaNa biddidru pakkada yele noNa Odisdranthe!”).

I must also mention about the political scenario we have right now. I was at a loss for words when Mr.Karunanidhi was so bent upon getting cabinet births for all his family members! It was a mockery of democracy to say the least. I wonder when people of TN will ever realize that this man is in the game only for personal reasons. For that matter I wonder who is clean after all. I am sure we won’t even get enough candidates to count in our fingers! But at the same time, I am optimistic that things are going to change. I can see the change in attitude for most of the people from “I don’t care” to “I can do something for a start.. i.e vote”. Also I can see that there are more young faces (though it does not rule out corruption) who I hope will bring about some change.

On a totally different note, I wonder when people will ever be “satisfied”. I am sometimes at loss for words or expression when people expect things which are totally uncalled for. Suppose A was never talking with B, the moment A talks to B, B “expects” A to talk nicely. A talks nicely, then the expectation is that A tells everything to B and so on... it’s a never ending expectation-cycle if I can call it that! Why can’t B be satisfied that A is on talking terms? The situation gets more complex when there is C and D to mix up the mind of B! Aaaarrrggghhhh!!!

Now, to end the post on a bright note… I am finally slowly getting back to shape, after being shapeless for almost a year ;-)! Though this does not mean I am thin even in a remote way... but atleast I am getting back to my normal (read original) weight :-)

Effects of Recession

- Most boring days at office. Ok, I am lucky that I have a job and all that but with most of the projects closing because clients have no money to give, it gets a tad boring to sit all day in office doing things totally worthless. Self motivation you may say… but you can’t do that every day and every night!

- Even people like P (my husband) have started going by bus to office ditching their beloved car… the sheer look at the credit card bills for fuel expenses must have forced him to do it. He just says it’s less strenuous... I know better! (as always)

- The grocery bills have doubled and the quantity halved. So is any other bill you can think of.

- The malls have a deserted look... whatever happened to the hip and happening crowd?

- The only word I hear everywhere I go is “Cost-cutting”… office, home … so much so even my maid has caught this word!

- I couldn’t believe that for the sankranthi festival people chose to give “one” banana along with yellu and kabbu… generally its two... so there you go!

- People used to leave their newspapers back in the bus after reading them… now I don’t see that happening. Maybe they are collecting them and giving to raddi wala for a few rupees.

- Dogs in my street have a starved look and it’s scary to go out at night. Looks like people are not giving them any leftovers!

I can go on and on… but I am myself depressed by this. Let me stop it here. Will think of something more lively to write next time.

who is better?

It has been said that “Manushya Januma” is the purest or ultimate form of life you can get through which (from your righteous living) you can attain “Moksha”. We have been brought up by giving various illustrations about how we can get an “animal” form in our next birth if we did something wrong.
- You would be born as a bed-bug in your next birth if you disturb someone’s sleep.
- Somebody had spoiled some family, and hence they are born as a cat in this birth
- If I keep some debt with you (not only monetary) I will be born as a dog in your house next time and I will repay your debt.

And so on... Whether these are superstitions are not is a separate debate. My point is not that. Are animals really less fortunate than humans? For a moment lets forget those animals which are captured by man and ill-treated; like the ones in circus and all. If we consider only that natural form of animals and re-ask the question… are we more fortunate than them?
Somehow I think differently. I feel they are more fortunate than us. They are satiated just by eating something and sleeping somewhere. But we? We need good food, we need a soft bed to sleep, we need people whom we love around us, we need money, we want this, we want that… not only greedy people; even the so called normal people need a lot more things than animals. If they don’t have them they die in misery. Whereas an animal unless dying of some disease (which we also do sometimes) never dies in misery. So how is an animal life less fortunate than a human life?

Animals don't nee to "think", which by itself is a major blessing if you ask me. They don't have to do future retirement plans, they don't even have to think about tomorrow. If they survive they do.. else they just go. But can we live like that? Never.

Hence I strongly believe that we humans are the most unfortunate because we can see/feel/think everything.

I had a neighbor in mysore, who used to feed their dog with dairy milk chocolates and kaju burfis. given a chance I would swap with snowy anytime!

Human Nature

Human nature is sure weird. Come to think of it I don't even know if its weird or confusing or straightforward (as human psychologists claim) or whatever...

Case1: My mom, a few years back had a slip disc and that troubles her every now and then. But you should have seen her during my sis's wedding. Everything was perfectly managed and her energy levels were on an all time high. Warnings from any number of family members to take care of herself fell on deaf ears. The very next day after the wedding her pains bounced back ;-). I know that people rise up to the situation and she also had to do it as it was her own daughters wedding and all that.... so are all ailments just in our mind? Can we overcome just anything and everything just by being strong in our mind?

Case2: Unfortunately my mom-in-law met with an accident recently and her left hand little finger had to be amputed. She also has a fracture in her wrist and so has a cast on her left hand. She is able to use only her right hand for now. But this has made her over sensitive. She insists on doing work with her one hand. If somebody offers to help she gets upset. My sister-in-law is home to help her take bath and all... but if she tries to overdo the helping part, she gets back immediately. She not only wants to do her own work, but also wants to do other house hold work. She used to completely manage the kicthen before and so now not being able to do that must have hurt her confidence really bad. Also I noticed one more thing. The moment people become too "sympathetic" she gets defensive. P and me tried to tell this subtely to my sister-in-laws not to greive about the bad thing that has happened in front of my mil. But then can't blame them as well... its their mother and they can't see that she is suffering, tries to help her as much as they can and inturn get scoldings ;-)
Now this is also a case of mind game. Empathysing with her physical pain, I can't help but feel that this "insecurity" and all is just again in her mind.

Case3: P. My most fav character for analysis. Its almost 9 years since I know him, but even now I can't predict how he will react in certain situations. He reacts in totally different ways for the same situation/condition on different days. Like for example, the other day I mentioned I was feeling very tired becasue of all this extra work (office, college, home and ofcourse P), he was very sympathetic... said that this is all temporary and from the next day he even got up with me at 5:30 in the morning to help me in the kitchen. Now thats a starightforward reaction from a caring husband. But then hold on.. thats not the end of the story. On last friday, I had to skip breakfast as I got late for college and had to rush. We were celebrating "Paksha" on that day in our house so when I came back from college in the afternoon there were guests at home, so couldn't have lunch also on time.. finally when I had lunch at 4pm I felt really really tired and had to sleep off for a few minutes to be able to walk again. That evening when I told that it happened this way, he shouted back at me saying he can't help it if I don't have food on time. He is not to be blamed. He cannot spoon feed me all the time and all that..... All I expected from him this time also was the same old reaction you know... just say that "oho... did it happen like that? make sure you get up 20 mins early from next time and eat breakfast..". That's it, nothing more, nothing less. But no, all I get is shoutings...
What should we call this. People behave differently in different situations is completely understandable, but why do people behave so differently for same situations?

P.S: have noticed that I analyse things a bit too much, like the above paragraph. I can't just move on thinking that yes people behave like this and that's the be all and end all. I always end up analysing anything and everything. Any tried and tested way to stop this tendency?

Run Run.. While you can

Last three months have been hectic to say the least. MBA at an “elite” institution has its disadvantages. My house is in a mess. My book (of the novels kind) reading has taken back seat. My hobbies (of what little was left) have no time. I don’t remember the last time I took an oil bath. On the whole, my life is in a mess :-). Last weekend marked the end of first term. One step (out of 10) closer to the black cap….

Mini-shark got married and I could devote only 5 days of my precious time for the wedding preparations which included attending the wedding as well… Couldn’t attend the second reception which happened in Chennai coz I had the term exams on the same day.

Looking back, is this what I asked for? Of course there are advantages. In mini-sharks wedding half the attention was on me… not only for being the bride’s sister but for also doing MBA from so-and-so institution ;-) Apart from this false attention, the learning is good. The way I look at things are different now. I never could understand one single word in my company’s annual report. But now I can decipher almost everything and also give suggestions… if only they asked for it ;-)

Strategy has helped me understand each company’s or its industry’s position. I know which business is attractive and which is risky. Though one might argue a lot of people can do this without a degree, I can substantiate my answers and not just base it on intuition :-)

Economics has taught me why the oil market behaves the way it does. Why the local dentist sometimes makes more money than an established dental clinic.

There is no doubt that it’s good what I am doing, after all its burning a whole in my pocket and it better be worth it!

I can’t help but wonder about the whole process of higher education. No doubt it makes us better intellectuals. Note the word “intellectuals”… that’s it. Not better human beings.

Even at this level,

- People lie about how they fared badly in the exams… but the scores say a different story!

- During class discussions each one is trying to snub the other and make a point himself/herself. It’s as if the world will come to an end if I didn’t make my point.

- People still hide their assignments till the last moment.

*Sigh* and I thought “Vidya dadaaathi vinayam”. Frankly I don’t see any difference in the behavioral part from what I saw in middle school to what I see now.

So these degrees sure help you earn money. You can now easily interact with fellow intellectuals. You can now write papers on global issues and can now advise one or two (those who care to listen) about the +ves and –ves of their decision and blah blah blah.

BUT, do these degrees in any way help you make this world a better place to live in? My over imaginative mind can’t help but think… If 50 years down the line when everyone in this world can afford higher education, will this world become a place where everyone is trying to snub the other, where each day is a competition, each one is trying to outdo the other… it’s a scary thought!

This reminds me… somewhere I read “The unfortunate part about the rat race is that at the end of the race, even the winner is a RAT...” How true!!!

Back to 3 Bs

As I had mentioned earlier in one of my posts, I am now back to "part-time" college. Today was the first day and it felt amazingly refreshing to be back with Books, Benches and Breaks :)
Living upto my reputation (my BE friends would know this) I reached the first class of first day "right-on-time". Meaning 2 mins past 8am when the classes had started at 8 am ;-)
Today being the first day I guess the prof let me in, but I fear his previous reputation says otherwise.
The hand outs were given.. some two huge books of case-studies. I wonder who really has the time and most of all patience to prepare all these :-/ Anyway that aside we are assigned "designated places" in the class. Apparently there is some weightage for class participation and it helps the profs if we sit in the same place everyday. Now this arrangement is done in alphabetical order... che! didn't get a chance to six next to that hunk! I thought like in school they would make the seating arrangements according to our height.. and was hoping against hope that I would get to sit next to him... (though conventionally a guy of my height wouldn't qualify to be a hunk. but what the hell! he is good looking!) alas! the profs thought otherwise.
So shark felt nice opening the crisp new books... writing down notes and keeping the additional books in the niche under the table.
The only thing I didn't like about my class was as usual the "over-smart/know-it-all" guys. Seriously pray tell me where do they come from? Today was the "first" day in accounts class... the prof is not even done with his own introduction.. and there is this guy who already starts asking questions after proudly declaring he already read the first two chapters... bah! The prof gave him a fitting reply "the first lesson of being a good manager is to learn to be patient!". Suits him! This breed of people will be there everywhere.. now they also have the advantage of being "experienced" *sigh*.

One more quite interesting part was that I did not feel sleepy in any of the class. I felt hungry though! The class gets over by 1pm.. and my system is programmed to eat lunch everyday at 12... so 1 hour delay was too much... stomachy.. get used to it now!
The "interesting" part in this is that I didn't sleep properly yesterday night; courtesy night show of "Dashavathaaram". Is that a movie in the first place? I went with such great expectations seeing all the rave reviews that it had got... and what did I get in return? 3 hours of complete torture! If I could describe this movie in one line "Its a self obsessed kamal + Tamizh fanatic movie". Imagine the whole world somehow knows Tamizh......bah!

I am back!

Finally after a long self imposed hiatus... I am back! Basically had been very busy with lots of things happening around, a series of exams, project pressures.. the same old stuff.

Well, so now I am finally back to the blogging world. I know none of you have missed me or anything... but I missed this virtual world.

As the wise men say.. let the show re-begin.

Some updates just to keep you all informed:

- mini-shark is getting married in another 4 months. (Pavan you had your chance.. .missed it!)

- I am finally going to pursue higher studies... after really trying n number of times ;-)

- Married life is as lively as ever with the number of fights increasing exponentially ... ;-)

- Work was pretty hectic till the last week. Finally getting a breather now. Will resume the same old hectic schedule in another 2 weeks when another release comes along.

- Too many social gatherings and parties happening around.

Well that's the update in short for the previous 6 months. Will be back again soon

Song Tag

Shruthi tagged me. A song tag. It took me a while to do this because it took me that much time to decide on the "one song" that is "our" song. The catch words here are "one" and "our".
As I have told a million times now (my regular readers will kill me if I say it again... pavan and s.b even have a contract for the same *sigh*) P and I are kind of opposites.
So moral of the story? It's impossible for me and P to have just one song as ours. He has some songs which he feels suits us and I have my own opinion (I try my best not to be partial with SRK songs). Here's the list.

1. The first song which P dedicated to me was Yaroon Dosti Badi Hi Haseen Hain. It was a kind of first date when we went to a small snack counter and he gave me the cassette as a gift. This will definitely be a special song for me and for him too (ah! some similarity...)
2. Khamosh Raat will also be special for the same above said reasons.
3. There is one song which both of like a lot and *surprise* it happens to be a SRK song; And that's none other than Suraj Hua Maddham He likes it so much that it's been his mobile caller tune for almost a year now!
   
4. Both of us love Bryan Adams songs and we play them in full blast when we drive down to Mysore
5. But one song which I can proudly say as our song is the Shaan version of One Love! **I hope P agrees with this though ;-) **

Ok that's it. Let me now get back to listening "my songs" !

To Sirs and Madams (Miss’) with Love.

Disclaimer: This post is a little belated. But then as the wise men say “Better late than never!”.

I owe this to my teachers. Its Teachers Day month and it’s only appropriate if I thank each one of them who have touched my life in some way or the other. The list below is in chronological order and not in the order of importance... I would never be able to choose one from other.
This one is going to be a very long one... since there are so many to thank.

1. Amma: Mine and everybody’s first teacher. Our teacher at home. She taught me how to eat, sleep, play, talk... you name it. A BIG thanks to you Amma :-)
   
2. Paati: My grandmother. What my mother didn’t teach me, it was taught by my paati. I love you paati... wherever you are, thank you *hugs*.
   
3. Nandini miss: My kindergarten teacher – I didn’t cry a single day to go to school. She was so motherly and cheerful! She was the one who facilitated my smooth transition from home to school….
   
4. Mani miss: My LKG and UKG teacher. Whenever I think of her, I remember Mother Theresa. She was just like that; so compassionate and caring. She used to roam around the school keeping us (students) in her waist… we used to eagerly wait for our turn to be carried by her around the school….
   
5. Primary School (1st to 4th class)
   
• Shyamala Miss: Not only did she teach us the normal subjects, she encouraged all of us to participate in all extra curricular activities.
  
• Puranthar Miss: She was extremely strict at times.. and yet extremely funny on other occasions. Our favorite past time would be to guess her mood ;-)
  
6. Middle School (5th to 7th class)
• Ramamani Miss: Our class teacher. The best anybody can have. She taught us everything; English, Science, Social Studies and Maths! She made sure we not only just finished our homework, but also understood each and every word of it.
• Skandavalli Miss: Our fashion teacher ;-) She was a fantastic science teacher, at the same time dressed immaculately. We girls used to admire her day in and day out. Our role model for looking good.
  
7. High School (8th to 10th)
   
• Miss Leena: The most beautiful woman I have seen till date. Our English teacher and extremely strict of course! She taught very well but at the same time her tests were very difficult.
  
• Miss Beena: Science teacher. She used to clear all our doubts with enthusiasm. I am sure she will remember me forever as the most doubt-asking girl in class ;-)
  
• Sister Cristella: Her smile, her charm, her energy. I was a kind of teachers-pet with her ;-)
  
• Miss Vasundara: Maths Teacher. Not a fantastic teacher, but a very good human being. We were family friends. Was always ready to help somebody in need.
  
• Miss Chandrika: Science teacher again. Known for her beautiful handwriting. She was kind of monotonous at time. She used to teach in a same leveled tone…. Afternoon classes were a challenge to stay awake ;-)
  
• Miss Sukanya: Taught Hindi. Though I never took Hindi. She was famous for her two plaits. The funniest part was she used to dye her hair only on the top. The line where she used to take the partition to form 2 plaits was still white ;-). The test books which she used to correct was full of red lines… not because the students would have made mistakes.. she used to read the answers by underlining them!
  
• Miss Srimathi: Sanskrit teacher. One of the most wonderful teachers I have had till date. Her lessons were a pleasure. Not one day was boring. Thank you miss! Because of you I am still fascinated by Sanskrit :-)!
  
• Sister Clarabella: Our Headmistress. THE sister! Known for her strictness at the same time fairness in treating her subjects. She managed the school fantastically.
8. P.U.C (11th and 12th):
   
• Sambashivayya Sir: The fantastic physics teacher. Even today his voice rings in my ears. The way he used to teach.. every single concept is in our blood. Seriously! The only danger from him was for the short people (first benchers).. if he got angry with “anybody” he would actually hit the person sitting in the first row! Poor people!
  
• GSS: Maths. Teaching and all was fine. He was good at it. But I remember him for other reasons! His son was in USA… yes THE USA. This son supposedly sent chalk (yes you heard it right! *chalk*) from America for his dear father to boast about it in front of his students! He made it a point that we never forget the generosity of his son and hence repeated it every time he got a new parcel from THE USA! Also he had two pet (I mean very very pet) students in our batch; PP and S. Whatever they said was “fantastic” and he wished they were his children. It simply got funnier by the day when he started taking “permission” from then to rub the board lol!!!!
  
• Sanskrit sir: I am extremely ashamed that I forgot his name. But I have not forgotten his lectures. It was fabulous to say the least. I have heard that people who had taken other languages used to come and sit in his class just to listen to him narrate Kalidasa’s “Abhijnana Sakuntalam “. Ah! Simply superb!
  
9. Engineering
   
   Most of the lecturers were good. But then in engineering colleges I guess friends influence you more than the teachers. I have very fond memories of our outings, group studies, etc etc etc. Will write a separate post on that sometime…

So all in all, Teachers, Thank you… Thank you for making me what I am today!

P.S: People like these really need some good teachers ;-)

1. Somebody please gift her, an Atlas!!

2. Killing is the only solution to all problems

Pheee Pheee Stop Stop!

I got a speeding ticket in India. In Bangalore (OK near Bangalore)... can you believe this?

It happened 2 weeks back. I was driving down to Mysore from Bangalore and bhang! in the middle of the road I am stopped by a cop with a cane ready to hit my car!

I get down to see if they are stopping me for some drug trafficking or something (exaggeration huh?)...

But alas! he says "madam neevu thumba fast aagi oodistheera!".. Well 65kmph is "very fast" in India (at least in Karnataka). The speed limit was 50kmph on a state highway :((( There was a board it seems .. I didn't even see that!

I made it a point to see that while coming back.. and believe me it was half worn out already.. couldn't even make out the lettering.

There goes 300rs. BUT I was happy :) no shark has not gone crazy.. I was happy the police had speed guns and stuff.. that they could "record" who went at what speed and also their number plates and stuff. They didn't give a sheepish smile and ask for 200rs without bill. I got a proper bill. I was let out in 5 mins without any hassles. India is progressing after all....

Milestone reached.

And that was my 100th post! Congrats shark.. you made it! You made it!
OK enough of exaggeration. I know it’s not a big thing. But I have seen bloggers write such kind of self congratulatory posts … so I guess it’s the in-thing now.
I have also made my point.

Thank you readers, for reading my blog… not so thanks to those who read but don’t comment on my posts :P. No thanks at all for those who don’t read my blog! (hah! As if they will come to know about this… anyways!). Lots of thanks to those who regularly visit my blog and also comment on every post… thanku thanku *bows*.

Illige blogprachaaravu mukthaayavaayithu. Namaskara!

Law Lessons

So when did shark get an L.L.B you might be wondering after seeing the title..? Let me correct it. Its in-law lessons :-)! After 7 months of marriage and living with in-laws here’s some Gyan for future daughter in-laws…

• Mothers are simply blindly in love with their sons ;-) The sooner you accept it the better marital life you will have. Whatever the son asks for he gets it. If P asks for coffee/tea even 100 times in a day, his mom will make it for him... and that too with a smile on her face :-) I wonder if I will do that even for my son without cribbing about it :-/. Sometimes it gets a little uncomfortable seeing a grown up man being pampered that way :P I wonder why mothers don’t do the same for their daughters? My SILs come to our house... but they cook and clean and help… never have I seen them being pampered by my mil ;-)
• Never display your love for your husband in front of them physically. First of all they are older generation people and don’t approve of physical display of affection even inside the house. Second of all, such gestures cause instant insecurity that the other woman enjoys more closeness with my son types.
• Accept it. She knows the best about her son. What he likes to eat, when he wants to go out etc.., as wives, we naturally tend to force our taste on our husbands. I mean, I like having healthy breakfast... like cornflakes and fruit... things like that. But P is not brought up that way; he likes to have rice (lemon rice, puliyogare etc) for breakfast, which I consider very heavy. When we were living together without our in-laws I used to force my “health-food” on him… poor P. But now his mom just knows what to make for him and makes it... and of course scores 100s of brownie points ;-)
• Never “tell” what your husband has asked for you to do. Simply do it. Else it will get done faster by your mil... and more points for her :P. Just to cite an example, last Sunday P wanted to have oil bath and asked me to massage his hair with oil. I kept the oil on the stove for warming and told my mil to switch it off in 2 mins, as I had to use the bathroom. By the time I came back she had already started massaging. There goes my much-dreamed-about romantic oil massage experience ;-).
• Praise her as much as possible. My mil is a fantastic cook... I simply adore her cooking. But she can’t make north Indian dishes... that’s my forte *ahem*. But the moment I make something different, she says “Oh this is very easy, I can also make it from next time”… So I tell her, “No amma, I will only make these things. If you make these things also fantastically, then I will be left with nothing to be called my own”... she is very happy that I have accepted her as the Mistress of the Kitchen :)
• They will and always will talk about children. Listen to them, smile and say yes. That’s it. Even if you have other plans. It was just 3 months since we were married, but the whole family (including my side) couldn’t stop asking “so when will the good news come”.. I am like aaaarrrrgggghh! Why can’t it be left to us to decide? Is having a child the very next step after marriage?
• Most of all set the expectations right the first time. No need to go on an impressing spree in the beginning and then start cribbing that you can’t live up to it. Every small thing matters.
• Wearing slippers at home. Not many elders approve of it, but I get cracked feet if I don’t… so I made it clear in the beginning that they will have to please excuse me for this.
• I don’t wake up “early” on weekends. I am totally zapped by the end of the week... (You have seen my schedule here!) I need to catch up on sleep over the weekends. Now everybody at home have late breakfast on weekends (Since it’s my cooking time over the weekends :-))
• Cooking: I offered to cook, but I can cook only in the night as that’s when I get time. But since my mil stays at home, she prefers to make fresh food in the morning... which is fine with me. But then I can’t help her in the kitchen... and this she knows.
• Make your priorities clear: Like, I give lot of importance to my career. Just make it clear to them, lest they expect something which you won’t be able to fulfill.

>

• Last but not the least, treat them just like your parents. After all, you don’t agree with everything what your parents say... but you still live with them lovingly. It’s the same way here; just that there are little more differences because of obviously different upbringing. The key is, just say yes the first time, then make your point and say no if you feel like. They will always take it better than a big no in the beginning itself.

Happy wooing your in-laws ;-)

Tit Bit Updates

Its fifteen minutes since I came to the bus stop. Usually there is a bus every 5 minutes, but looks like its holiday for bus drivers... and that too must be a common occasion. Whatever! Finally 2 buses come together to the location and they stop. I walk over and climb the first bus. Some people decide to take the next bus, for whatever reason. One particular girl is still undecided. First or second? She moves two steps towards the first bus and then decides second one is better (maybe there is a window seat available?)
She goes towards the second one, but driver starts off… so she walks back to towards the first one, but by then this driver has also started off. Generally these drivers wait if they a see a person coming and this has happened many times with me only. But for some strange reason he doesn’t want to wait today. He also moves on. This girl has now missed both the buses… For a moment I thought she was waiting for someone… so maybe she didn’t take either of the buses. But guess what? An auto comes to a screeching halt in front of our bus after 3 stops… and who gets out? Lo and behold! The same girl… At last she decided to take the first bus after all! :-)

I arrive at my sil’s(Sister-In-Law) place at 9 in the night. It is almost 2 weeks since I saw her kids. Just as I step into her room, the younger one who is just over 6 months old, starts goo-gooing and smiles heartily at me. I go a little near to him, and he raises his hand as if asking me to pick him up. I oblige… my pleasure sweetheart !:-)
Ah then the display of affection starts… he drools all over me... he holds my hair and brings my face near to him... and starts licking me on my face… oh my!my! cute little darling might have mistook me for his mom… but then the pleasure was all mine!
I had always heard “jealousy thy name is woman”, but it’s different in this case. The elder one who is also a boy is now jealous, that I am holding his brother and so happy with him. He insists on playing with me then and there! Well OK, so the playing starts, he wants to box with me, he wants to show all his toys and I am supposed to play all of them at once ;-) So we start off... he is now super man (equipped with his superman t-shirt and all) and he wants to climb over me! He does it even when his mom is asking him not to. Then it was time for bed, and he insists that I tell him a story… I do and he sleeps with a smile on his face… Ah! The simple pleasures of life…

And most of all P will be back in 3 days time. Yippee! I had never missed him so much before in my life. It was always the other way round ;-) I was out on long onsite trips and he was in India. His trips were always very short; max 3 weeks. But the sad part is he will go back again after 2 weeks for another 3 months. Booo hoooo…..

Last week was emotionally taxing. One of my aunt with whom I thought I was very close with didn’t invite me for a function at her home. I think I know the reason, but I am surprised that strong relationships break for silliest of reasons! People rather prefer to hold grudge that mend the break. I tried my best... but then if people don’t want to hold the tie I am not the one who is going to force it.

Mini-shark (my sister) will be visiting India this month. Awww I have missed her terribly. She will be here just for a week to attend our cousins wedding, but just the thought of seeing her and sharing so many things with her makes me jump with joy. Phone and email just cannot give that personal touch.

Of Nightmares and SweetDreams

These are some of my night time memories, often repeated. I know there are people out there who can conjure up some meaning out of this, but I don’t want to know… what if it says something bad. Ok I am paranoid about knowing the future. I like to take life as it comes. Anyway read on… as the tradition goes bad things first.

Nightmares:

1. I am in a public place and suddenly my legs fail me... I am no longer able to walk, people don’t come for help. I start crawling on the floor, and my clothes start tearing. I am afraid I will go nude before I reach home… but the dream “always” stops at this point.
2. I get up and see myself sleeping (which means I am dead?)
3. 2 or 3 of my dead relatives are mix-and-matched, like body of one with head of other etc and they come and sit and talk with me …brrrrrrrr
4. I come inside the house and see shadows moving all around the house, and suddenly the whole house becomes completely dark; again I always get up at this point drenched in sweat and feeling terribly scared!

Sweet/Funny Dreams:

1. Sri Satya Sai Baba of Shirdi comes out of the picture (which I have in the pooja room) and gives me a dAswALa flower.
2. I am running in a yellow flower field (remember DDLJ?) and I am extremely happy about something.
3. I am on a stage speaking something, and 1000s of people are cheering me.
4. I go to buy milk, the milkman is milking the cow there and as soon as I reach there pista flavored milk starts coming from the cow ;-)
5. My aunt comes to our house wearing a noodle strap top and a mini skirt (FYI, she is very fat and not exactly the good looking types). No offense meant but she does look real funny... I can’t help it ;-)
6. I am some 10 years old and I hide my father’s glasses. He can’t see a thing so me and my sis sit and watch TV on “mute”… lol! (My father wears specks, but he can definitely manage without them. And oh ya! TV was absolutely forbidden during our school days except for the 9pm DD News :-)) – It’s been a million years since I was 10, but still this dream doesn’t seem to leave me.
7. My mom is being chased by a robber, and instead of running on the road, she is into hurdle race, jumping over our neighbors’ compound walls!
8. My cousin gets up one morning only to find all her hair eaten by a bunch of rats (She is a sweet cousin of mine, but keeps boasting of her long thick black curly hair… dreaming this might be my revenge ;-) )

Can I have 36 hours in a day please?

As boring as it may sound, here's my itinerary of an average day

6:00am : Wake up - with great difficulty and sheer willpower of course!

6:20am to 7:30am : Daily activities, Make coffee, Read Newspaper, Get ready, Do Pooja, Leave to office (The initial 20 mins is for actually getting up ;-))

8:45am : Reach office, have breakfast at the desk itself and get to work...

12:00pm to 1:00pm : Lunch

1:00pm to 1:30pm : Time pass, like blogging or checking forwards etc...

1:30pm to 5:15pm : Work again in full swing, with an in between coffee at the desk. Leave for home

6:45pm to 7:30pm : Reach home, have coffee, freshen up and relax for sometime.

7:30pm to 8:30pm : Study time. I have some certifications/entrance exams lined up :(

8:30pm to 9:30pm : Prepare (basically heat sambar;already prepared by my mil, and make chapathis) and have dinner

9:30pm to 10:30pm : Serial time :) and some chit chats with in-laws during breaks ;-)

10:30pm to 11:00pm : Prepare for the next day (wash my tiffin, iron clothes etc)

11:00pm to 12:30pm : Study some more... the last 20 minutes is just falling asleep, but trying to be awake and read something else will feel guilty the next day.

Now that you have seen the schedule, I still have LOT many things which I would want to do, but just don't have the time for it. Some of them being,

• Social Work (Involve myself in the activities of an orphanage or an old age home)
• Practice music/ play veena (I feel ashamed sometimes that I have almost lost my touch!)
• Go to dance (Bharathanatyam) class
• Do some painting (I was very interested in this in my school days.. but after that have hardly had time for it)
• Call up old friends (Except for very few with whom I interact regularly, I hardly keep in touch with old friends...che..che..)
• Visit my cousins (Some of them are very young, and I would love to spend some time with them.. but where, pray tell me where is the time?)
• Go for some concerts (Ah! It's almost ages since I drowned myself in some good carnatic music concert)
• Read some good books, religious and philosophical (Somehow I do read novels during my bus journey to office :).. long live traffic jams!)
• Experiment some good recipes (ya.. I am very fond of cooking... as long as there are people to eat them ;-))
• Play some games (me and my sis used to play badminton/Chess/Carom etc in the good old days.. now?)

*sigh* I know! I know! you will tell me.. what are weekends for?... Here's what it is for

• Shopping - The necessities like groceries and other house hold articles... and sometimes if there is a necessity to shop for personal stuff like dress or shoes... some function on the way. Gone are the days when I used to shop just for fun... ah! the bliss of bachelor life :)
• Cleaning the house - This takes away most of the time! But I love it :)
• Urgent or mandatory visits - Have to give something to somebody, someday had a baby, somebody is ill, some function, kind of visits.
• Studying and oil bath activities :)

So there you go.. weekends go faster than the weekdays, even before you realise it's over :(

In the midst of all this, questions have subtly started coming in about my plans of starting a family... hello! *knock* *knock* Where is the time? "IF" I can feed my children "while" I am studying, if I can play with them while I am cooking, If I can make them to do homework while I am cleaning and closing the kitchen for the day, if I can help them with their school project work while I am in office... they can come and be a part of my life anytime ;-) But, till I get this great multitasking ability... kids.. you have to wait...

As much as I LOVE kids... I also want to give 100% of myself to them... so till I can do that, they can't make an entry.

OR oh ya.. if I can have 36 hours in a day....

P.S: If only some of my relatives could read this blog ;-)

in-law... in-home

Finally I am getting to live with my in-laws. Since P is in Europe on official trip, my in-laws decided to move in sooner than planned earlier just to avoid me staying alone.
I feel guilty, because for me they had to virtually “abandon” their home town to come and stay with me. I told them that I am used to living alone… but now that I am their bahu, it’s their responsibility to look after me it seems. Choo chweeet (you guys don’t even dare to put nazar!)
I thought my blog will have some spicy stuff from now on, some saas-bahu dramas… but alas! No such thing readers, my saas is as docile as you get them. She gets up earlier than me and makes me breakfast and packs lunch… dinner is ready by the time I get home (no nazars pleeease!!!)
I have thrown the weighing machine out of the window. I am scared to even step on it. With all this eating and not doing any work at home, you can imagine the consequences.
The only issue at hand is to keep my mil from getting bored. With no friends or relatives nearby, being new to the city so not confident enough to roam around on her own… she is virtually under house arrest. My fil somehow manages with short walks around and things like that.
To somehow balance the situation, I have now ended up discussing all the serials with her :-). She watches as many as possible during the day and tells me the story when I get back home… well as long as it keeps her happy I am game for story telling!

Foot note on a lighter Note : A poem (not original of course!)

He didn't like the curry
And he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard...
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't prepare the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Isn't there anything I could do
To match his mothers shoe
Then I smiled as I saw light
One thing I could definitely do
I turned around and slapped him tight...
Like his mother used to do!!!!!

Advice needed

I have a maid in my house. She has 2 children, boys. One is in 9Th class and the other in 8Th class.

It's new academic year for them, and they study in good schools (which is nice). The cost of purchasing books for each of them for the year is around 1200rs. They have to buy this in the school itself.

My maid is a very nice woman. Always has a smile on her face and does whatever work I ask her to do without grunting or anything. She somehow found the money to get books for her elder son and he started going to school from today. But she is yet to get books for her second son, so obviously he is missing a week or two of his school because of this.

The problem: I want to help. She has not asked me for any money. Not even as a loan. But I feel like buying the books for the second son. But, she is just 2 months old in my house and I must confess I don't know her very well and all. And I don't want her to take undue advantage of my help. I am not expecting money in return, but I don't want her to expect I will help always.

So what do I do?

Beardy Misery

I am fed up trying to get P shave his beard regularly! What's with you guys? What's so difficult in shaving a simple beard? I have tried every known technique to get him shave his stupid beard regularly, but till now not one has been successful! He shaves only when he wants to!!!

Below are some of our conversations. My "requests" followed by his responses (denials) in italics.

• P, why don't you take a shave today: "No ma, it's not grown enough, I will surely do it tomorrow"
• (Next day) It's already 6:45 we have to leave in another 20 minutes and you have to take a shave P, why don't you get up?: "Oh come on! from when did a shave become more important than my blissful sleep? I need rest, I had a tiring day yesterday."
• (2 days later) P, I think today you HAVE TO take a shave, see I didn't bother you yesterday also... please sweetheart (notice the "maska" words...) do it na : "Dear, tomorrow it's Saturday.. weekend. Who will see me over the weekend except you? So why do you worry.. will do it once and for all on Sunday so that I can go fresh on Monday. Please..."
• (Come Monday again) Will you do it today at least? (no maska now... a little irritated actually) : "Oh! Didn't I tell you? My colleagues told me I look good with a beard, so I have decided I will keep it after all!" (My reaction: what!!! who are those morons who thinks a beard looks anything other than dirty...grrrrr)
• (That evening) You know what P, nothing turns me ON more than a clean shave face.... (This is the max I can do.. hoping for some positive results) : "Why didn't you tell me this before... will surely do it tomorrow **sweet smile**!!" (Ah! you may think I am a very happy woman after that.... fat chance! notice the word "tomorrow"... and tomorrow never comes...!!!)

Yesterday, one of my old friends called after a long time and he suggested we have lunch/dinner sometime together. He is also recently married. I mention this to P, and guess what he says "Ah! That guy, his wife is very beautiful, let me know in advance when we are going out together.. I will take a shave that day." *ahem* well! At least now I know what is the incentive for the much needed shave!!!!!

I am bored

Yes. I am! I want something interesting to happen in my life. I know I know I am being greedy out here... but lets just accept it I am greedy!

I am badly missing my sister. She is in Australia right now and I have no female company in the house.

P has been extremely busy these days with his work and invariably comes home late.

We go to Mysore in the weekends to my in-laws place. But then, my in-laws don't let me do any work and so I sit around the house all day long with absolutely nothing to do! While P blissfully goes off to meet his friends.

Work is good, but unfortunately my whole team is in an another office and I sit all alone in a cabin and just do my work! I hate this! I need teams to work with.. it is more fun!

How I wish mini-shark was here! We could go for some window shopping or we could watch some movies at home.. or simply gossip about all our family members ;-) Aaaaaaaa why did she have to go! grrrrrr