Wednesday, May 24, 2006


I didn't want to put up a new post till I had enough answers for my previous one.
So my dear bloggers.. please do reply to me previous post as well... even after reading this..:)
I could not resist myself after seeing this picture....

This is again my Mysore office..:) This building is one of the food courts that we have. Oh my! what a beautiful sight...:D Sunset at it's best.

Some of the the thoughts that crossed my mind after seeing this...

Lost -- somewhere between sunrise and sunset, two golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes; no reward is offered, for they are gone forever." ~Smiles~

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. - Anne Frank

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Time and Love

Does love for someone change with time?
This is the question that's haunting me for quite some time now....

Case 1:
My friend. Happily married for 2 years. Arranged marraige. In-laws are great! Living in a joint family where other women (SILs)are housewives. She gets to be the most cared for female in the house, because she goes out for work. Everything working fine and fantastic. Husband is also great! well settled..caring etc etc.
Commuting time is too much (Thanks to the terrible traffic jams!!). Decided to live in a house separately near to office. Everything fine for an year. But suddenly one fine day felt that Husband is not trustworthy.. tells lots of lies (small ones yaar! not extra marital affair kinds!!). So.... LEFT HIM! After a year now, divorce is also got. Legally separated.

Case 2:
Again my friend. Happily married for 4 years. Love marraige. Everything is going on smooth.. not much of parents support ( or interference), because they married going against them. So, both are just happy with themselves. Wife starts to grow in her career.. starts to earn more than HIM. Trouble starts.. he easily finds a chance to tell her sarcastically that she is "acting" like this because she earns more. She is also equally adamant.. says if that is the case, why can't he improve himself and earn more than her? In between all this hara kiri.. they have a child also. Things kind of cools down after this, the point of attention changes. BUT after a year... things are back where they left.... Now, both are emotionally strained souls. You have to "search" for happiness in their lives. There is still love somewhere..and hence they have not yet thought of divorce... but they just decide to spend more time apart than together.

Is this what life is? I wonder...

My basic reasoning.. when we can love our parents, siblings unconditionally (Though we might not agree with whatever they say!). Why can't we love our partners also like that? We all know that nobody is perfect.. everybody have their own +s and -s. Why can't we accept our partners also just as they are! Why does when it comes to partners "we want them to be how WE want them to be"?
If my father didn't buy me what I wanted.. I would surely cry and hoot and make a big hullah.. but then that would be max for 1 day... after that it's back to normal.
I never expected my parents to give me a "surprise" on my birthday... actually never ever "celebrated" in the house on my birthday for that matter.

But in the same situation, if you replace "father" with "husband" why does the husband become bad? Why do we think that his love for me is fading... that;s why he does all this to me? WHY?

Why does the so called love for your partner fade away after some time? I know there are lots of success stories as well.. where people are happily married for 30 years..:) I am right now talking about the failed ones!

And that too when things we "actually" nice.. if it was a terrible mistake from the beginning then that's a different issue.
Why do people just decide after 3-4 years of happy marraige that their partners are no longer "compatible"??????

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Deep Blue Sea

This is the movie which came to my mind first when I saw the brochure of "Dallas World Aquarium". It boasted of big sharks, large fish tanks world's largest infact..;-)!
With my expectations set that high.. I was kind of dissapointed after seeing the so called "big" building. But in any case went inside. We were welcomed by 4 cute penguins, but felt sad because they were kind of imprisoned in a glass case..:(

Further inside there was an artificial forest setting. Not very natural.. but very well set.
The whole aquarium is well maintained. There aren't too many species or anything, but whatever was there was very nice and colorful.:)

The welcoming view of the forest

I will not go into the details of each and everything that I saw there! It's too boring to write.. and I am sure it's all the more boring to read it..:D

Some of the snaps.. please note the captions for them.

This one reminds me of my sister... peacefully sleeping;-))

This one was really huge.. Guess more because of the magnifying glass!

Looks like they have faught. Must be husband and wife..;-)

The best part of this place was the "Mayan Dance". It seems most of the artifacts that were displayed here belonged to the Mayans.
There was a performance from the "Mayans" in this place. It was cool.. the music was great.. foot tapping kinds. They kind of played with the fire also.:)
One of the snaps is below.. can't put any more as it has me in that...:D

Monday, May 15, 2006

Love you Amma

With all this mother's day celebrations going on around me, I can't stop myself thinking about my mom....
She's the best mom anyone can ever have. I know, all of us say the same... but that does not make any of our moms less special.
I can hardly think of a day when she did something for herself. She always thought about us first and then herself.
I don't remember thanking her anytime for all that she has done to us (me and my sister). She was a career woman, headmistress in a high school. But we never had a nanny or anybody.. she always found time to take care of us. We were also studying in her school which was kind of an advantage...:) (For us more... becasue we could get away from the boys bullying us... after all we were the head madam's daughters..;-)))

As a dutiful wife

She was or rather still is a very dutiful wife. Never did anything against my fathers wishes. Infact when my father got transferred to a different place, she just resigned her job! just like that we could relocate.
I know I will never do such a thing so easily..;-) I will make sure my husband has a tough time re-locating..;-)

She is lovable... sociable...

She is always so good with my friends, she knows exactly what to talk with whom...:D
For that matter she is so good with everybody, from a 2 year toddler to an 80 year old woman, she can socialize with anybody and everybody.
Her extra curricular activities are just endless! she is a writer.. writes novels, articles etc. Does creative embriodery and tailoring. Sings beautifully:)
Cooking.. my father always preffered more than one dish for lunch/dinner.. so we always had variety! Then after my father had a open heart surgery, his diet was kind of low oil, low spice .. so there was all the more variety... one set for him,.... and one set for us...:)

She is an epitome of courage

My father's illness reminds me how courageous she was during that whole thing.
It was the greatest test of her courage. My father had a very sudden heart attack, and he was to be operated immediately. She handled everything single handedly.. and never let us get scared.... she wore that smile on her face always when she was to see us.. she made sure everything was proper in the house also....
She always encouraged me in whatever i did... was with me in whatever i was interested in.. music dance.. everything.
Sometime my father was a bit upset about me spending too much of my time in dance class rather than studying... we used to have heated arguments for that.. but my mom always supported me... never ever let me down. She was the only person who had confidence in me, that I would do both...
She never even thought twice for sacrificing her "needs" for our "wants".

She taught me great lessons

She taught me to be artistic in life. She taught me to be independent. She taught me how to behave in public. She taught me to respect elders. She taught me music. She taught me appreciate small pleasures in life. She taught me how to love somebody unconditionally. She taught me that family comes first above everything. She taught me life is not about goods and bads, it's about your attitude. She taught me to pray, to beleive in God.

Amma... I really love you... very very much. I would love to see you happy at all times. I hope I can be the ideal daughter you want me to be one day....:)

Tip Tip Barsa Paani....

Wow! This is how our office campus looked like last week when there was a hailstorm..:) I guess this was the first ever hailstorm the city saw.. such a heavy one I mean.

The city is known for it's hot weather, and now with all that ice.. it looks like it snowed.. what a beautiful sight...:)

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

"Proper" Attrire for women!

Whenever anybody says "formal" attrire for women.. what does that mean?

For men, I guess it is more or less well defined! Full armed shirts, pants and tie (Balzer, in case the envi is "too" formal) and shoes.

So now, how do we define it for women? Specially Indian women?

Now, here's the set of rules...

1. No "sleeve-less" dressses or tops
2. No half/mega sleeved tops!
3. No "tight" fitting clothes (I wonder who can define what is tight and loose.. the one wearing it or the one seeing?)
4. No wrap around skirts
5. No "transparent" chudidars (how do you define or measure the transperency???)
6. Saree: Please tie in such a way that it does not show any parts of the body which are not be shown. Pleated pallus preffered!!!
7. ONLY 3/4th full sleeved shirts on troushers!!! (In this summer???)
8. Duppattas are to be worn to "serve the purpose"!

So, in a work place (with formal environment).. you are "supposed" to wear something which adheres to "all" of these rules.

But the question is.. should somebody tell people what to wear and what not to wear? If you are a office goer... well you would be atleast 21+. This means you kind of know what is ok to wear... to office... and what is not-ok!! If on top of this, some people choose to wear in-appropriate dress, wouldn't it be better to just "educate" them individually? rather than making a book of rules for everybody!

Now, the whole context of my post is women's attire, so if a lady chooses to wear in appropriate clothes.. she is doing it at her own risk.. inviting trouble.

We are not some school kids right? wherein there used to be a nail leader (who checks the cleanliness of nails!), ribbon leader, bench leader..what not!

Anyway all said and done, rules are rules. When imposed are to be followed! This I agree completely.

Now, in any educated society, when somebody says something, it is questioned for it's motive. So this "attrire definition" should also questioned.

My questioning goes like this... Please note I am talking in the context of Indian women.

Do women in the so called western countries dress this way? Do they cover themselves from head to toe!!??? DOn't they get respect from their colleagues?

Well... people say those are western countries.. and we are in India.. so things are different like many other things. Fine agreed.

But then one of the comments for this issue, by an "educated Indian male"... has made me burn wild with anger...
just read it.. in His hown words...

"There is lot of difference between exposure of males' body and exposure of female's body ( especially in a country like India where more respect is given to women).

So the directive of avoiding sleeveless for women is introduced, i think the reason may be to cover woman's beauty(in this case arms).

That is good idea, following cultural traditions..............."

WOW!! what a statement!
I am shocked beyond words after reading this!! If an educated well placed individual can speak like this... what more can i expect from a common man?????

Please excuse me? "cover the beauty?" in arms? my god! I am laughing to splits here...... Even if you chose to show off your beauty.. what's wrong? What is beauty for? oh ya! i forgot!!! it's only for your husband to see right??? miserable me! how can i even think beyond that!

I am sure if given a choice he would ask his mother/sister/wife to go out ONLY in burkha!!!! I thought world over people are encouraging women to come out of the burkha and lo and behold just around me...:((((((

So now, my thought goes something like this....
Does attrire really matter? Of course I do not deny the fact that you cannot come to office in your night dress just becasue it does not matter! But do we really need to have "rules" and "regulations" and that too so-outdated?

There are quite a few companies which actually allow people to come to work in shorts! nobody cares!

If you are a programmer... and from morning till night all you do is sit in front of the computer and code... with some occational (once a week) team meetings.. do you really have to dress up so much?

It makes sense to maybe the HR/management team who interact with people specially outsiders. It makes sense for them to dress formally.

My point is not even formal/informal attire.. it's for the point that somebody tells you not to wear sleeveless/half sleeved shirts!! The reason behind it... well it does not create a "good" work environment... and to be more specific "men will be distracted"..;-))

Is the so called "evil" present in the woman's body (that too hands for christ's sake!!! don't men have hands????)) or is it in the man's mind?????

Why is it that in western countries women wear mini skirts and blouses showing off their cleavage.. no-body even gives an absurd second glance? And in India why is it that a man is ready to pounce on you.. for a simple thing as give him a glance?

So does it prove that it's the mind that is corruped and not the body (woman's)!!!!!

And coming back to the point of this guy who said: "especially in a country like India where more respect is given to women"

how true!!!!
1. we have the lowest sex ratio
2. We have the highest number of child rapes recorded!
3. Even elderly widows are not left at peace....
4. Call center females are getting brutally murdered!
5. Women are forced to marry men of their parent's choice!
6. Highest prostitution!
7. In some village in rajastan.. the sex ratio is so low.. one woman is "shared" between more than 3 men! ofcourse for money!!!!!
8. How many times you are "hit" in the wrong places when you go on road, when you are in the bus, when you are in a crowded place?
9. Even in the metropolitan cities, abortions are carried out after knowing that it's going to be a female child!
10. In villages female children are killed just after birth by putting in a rice grain in the mouth with milk!

All this and we say, women are like godesses!! cut the crap man! I have seen women respected much much more in countries where they don't even have a culture of their own!!

When are we ever going to change our mind set?
When are we going to accept women as something more than an object of pleasure?
When are we going to respect women as human beings and not some curved creatures?
When are we ever going to look beyond a woman's body... understand her feelings, respect her sentiments?

How would men feel... if every woman who passes by them, "scrutinizes" them from top to bottom? and pass absurd comments?

Why is it always that a woman should change? why can't the thinking of men change? hmmmmm i know, I am asking for too much here.. it's not such an easy thing!

I wonder when will we ever get Independence as Mahatma Gandhi dreamed of ..." India would "actually" be independent when women can roam around at 12 in the night fearlessly on the streets"....

How he did not realise that it's too far fethced a dream to come true... with our mentality!

A sad day in a woman's life.

Monday, May 08, 2006

I loved this....

Two guys meet in a bar, and one says to the other, "Did you hear the news? -- Paul's dead!" "What!?! Paul is dead? What happened to him?" "Well, he was on his way over to my house the other day and just as he arrived, he hit the gas instead of the brake, and boom -- the car hit the curb and flipped up and he crashed through the sunroof -- went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."

"Oh, God, what a horrible way to die!"
"No, no, he survived that; that didn't kill him at all. So, he landed in my upstairs bedroom and he was all covered in broken glass on the floor, with a broken leg. He spotted the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reached up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He was just dragging himself up when bang, the massive wardrobe came crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."

"That's terrible! What an awful way to die!"
"No, no, that didn't kill him; he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawled out onto the landing; he tried to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister broke and he fell off he landing. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spun and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him!"

"Oh, my God, what a way to die!"
"Well, that didn't actually kill him either, he even survived that. So he was on the downstairs anding, just beside the kitchen. He crawled in to the kitchen, tried to pull himself up on the stove, but grabbed a big pot of boiling water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him."

"Man, that's got to hurt! To burn to death!"
"Yes, I'm sure it would, but he survived that! He was lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spotted the wall phone and tried to pull himself up to call for help, but instead he grabbed the light switch and pulled the whole thing off the wall, and, of course, the water and electricity didn't mix and he got electrocuted, wallop,

240 volts shot through him!"

"That killed him, though, right?"
"Well, no, he survived that, he ..."
"Hold on, just how did Paul die, then?"

"Well, I shot him!"

"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"

"I had to. He was wrecking my whole house!"

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Psuedo Secularism

Consider two incidents:

Incident 1: May 01 2006: Violence in Kashmir leaves 35 people dead!

Some militants disguised as soldiers and gunned down 35 kashmir's hindu minority people in a small village.

Mr.Prime Ministers reaction: Kashmir's people have always been brave.. they have always protested militancy!

Is that all you expect from your prime minister for such a gruesome killing?????? what crap! how can you justify the killings by just terming the people brave!! poor soles what could they have done except getting killed!!!!!

I have a colleauge who is a Kashmiri pandit... and you can see the pain in her eyes everytime she narrates how they "ran" away from kashmir... which was once termed as "Paradise on earth"...:(

No further action was taken.. oh ya! how can you track down militants? how can you find them? you can't find them right!!! :-/

Leave alone the government, where are those human right watchdogs & where are those leftist liberals ?

This was not the first mass killing or anything... this has been happening for ever!!! But still our watchdogs are just mute spectators!!

Incident 2: May 03 2006 (not very sure of the date): Vadodara: Man burnt alive!

Now supposedly this man was from a minority muslim community....

Lo and behold! there is so much of violence in vadodara becasue of this! a complete communal violence has started and the situation is out of control of the police!

Extra troups are being brought in!

Now... that is fast action!!!:)

Though I express my sympathies to "all" those who are killed in such acts... but then one question really makes me think... is a life of 1 person more valuable than the lives of 35 people? or is it just because he is from a minority community?

Sometimes i really wonder... do hindus in India.. supposedly their "own" mother land... live happily? Are they really enjoying the "majority" status?

I am not against any religion... but then i can't help myself wondering... is being a Hindu Brahmin a crime????
If somebody kills you... nobody (read government) bothers about it... If you want to have a good education... well "reservation" does not let you do it!
Where do we stand? where do we "belong"???

It's time we rose up against this!!! we are too soft... not really seeing the enormity of the trend.....
But then the million dollar question is... HOW DO I DO IT??????

Monday, May 01, 2006

My first weekend in US

I have started driving car in US...:) I know it's not a big thing.. but then.. my colleague is also a freak on cars just like me...:) so he gets a new rental car every week...;-) so now i have driven 2 cars, one chevrolet and another stratus. I am getting to know all the american models.. there sure is a lot of variety!!

When I was in germany.... though I must admit I never actually analysed or looked at them very closely... 'coz I never felt the need for a car...:) I did not notice too many models...
But then, here every car is a different model... and I like variety..:D

I had started driving to work from last thrusday.. but then on saturday I went on the freeway for the first time...
and all along the only thing i could think of was... when will my India become like this...:-/

We had been to the airport to drop off a colleague, as he was returning back to India. We came back from there... went to some place (I don't remember the name right now!) to have lunch... and as usual nothing vegetarian avialable.. finally ordered for something sutom without meat... without fish!

Later on we went for a movie... there is something called a dollar theater here.. you get to watch a movie for 1 dollar...:D watched "Aquamarine". It was a cute and funny movie.. watchable once...:)

Went to a half price book shop... now that is the place I would love to be in...:) bought some books... some authors which I have never heard of before...;-) but thought will give it a try...

And finally as usual went to an Indian stores to do some weekly Indian items shopping, ended up renting a Tamil moview DVD....:)

Came back home.... had dinner and watched the movie...:) the movie was nothing fantastic though!

Sunday: Cleaning and general loafing around . My sister had warned me NOT to clean the house... she said some people might not like it clean...!!! and here I share my appartment with other people... but then i just could not control... so I thouroughly cleaned my spacious bathroom... and the kitchen...:D kind of "re-arranged" the stuff in the living room... Anyway after this weekend I will be alone in this appartment for some 3 weeks... that time i will make it spic and span...:D

Sunday went to return back the dvd... and ended up renting a kannada movie this time...:) some old Anant Nag movie...:d rellay funny it is.. haven't watched it fully... we have been watching just 20 mins at a time... so we are just half way thru the movie right now...:)

Well that was my first weekend in US. Nothing fantastic about it.. but then after a looooooooong time i got some time for myself... This is the best part of being onsite.. you can just be alone when you want to...:D:D:D