Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Celebrating Life and Death

Before last week a family of 7 died in a road accident. They were distant relatives of P. We went to express our condolences to them at night. The scene was horrifying to say the least.

I had not seen a dead body in my life until the day of my Pati’s sad demise. The scene is still etched in my memory. The way they bought the “body” into the house, and when I touched my Pati, she was all hard and life less… For the first time in my life I got scared of touching her! That was 10 years ago.

Yesterday’s memory will also remain forever. People who die in accidents die horribly. Bodies crushed… parts not recognizable…. I had only heard of these things before. Saw it yesterday. Having a soft heart doesn’t help the situation either! The surviving members of the family were inconsolable! Loosing just one member at a time itself is horrible… just imagine loosing 7 at a time. I don’t know them... so I was just a mute spectator, but though I was not emotionally attached to them at all... I could not control my tears. I don’t even know the names of who have died, but I cried with their family. I just could not help it.

Came home quite late and as expected had to take head bath and wash all the clothes which we were wearing. Finally settled down to sleep… since we had just taken bath at that time... sleep was still far away. So P and I started discussing about life in general.

Isn’t it quite surprising that we never realize that we can get a “call” anytime? But still we fight to be here. We fight for petty things.

  • Daughter In-Law fights with Mother In-Law to have more control of her husband (what will she do with it? When he or for that matter she is “gone”?)
  • Siblings fight for money from their parents. Will they take it when they go?
  • We work day in and out to save money and build a new house and make it as comfortable as possible with all the amenities. Just to be gone without anything one day?
  • People murder other people if they face failures in love or business. Will they take their partners be it business or personal along with them when they go?
  • When people die “suddenly” they would not have even said a proper “bye” to their near and dear ones. But when they are alive they don’t have time to say “Hi” to the same near and dear ones. How ironical!

Having thought about all this we realized we are not celebrating the God given “life” to the full extent. We should thank God for every single day he gives us and live it the fullest.

LIVE LIFE LOVE LIFE… who knows when we have to let go?


nags said...

That is a nice post. Having lost my mother just 2 months ago, I can feel it very deeply.

Kavi said...

This is one of the most thought provoking post that i have read in recent times !

Isnt it ironic, that we spend our lives trying to earn money and comfort and then spend the money trying to reclaim our lives !

"LIVE LIFE LOVE LIFE… who knows when we have to let go?" - How thought provoking !

bellur said...

"When people die “suddenly” they would not have even said a proper “bye” to their near and dear ones. But when they are alive they don’t have time to say “Hi” to the same near and dear ones. How ironical!"

gods ways are strange. as most of us know, in vaikunta, the 2 guards jaya-vijaya got cursed and took 3 births in bhooloka.

in the first birth, sriman narayana appeared suddenly as varaha and narasimha and killed them even before hiranyaksha-hiranyakashyapu could realise what was happening. so no question of saying hi-bye.

in the second janma, ravana got insulted during his first meeting with rama in the warfield. rama sent back ravana to say bye to all his people in lanka. ravana atleast had some doubts before dying that maybe rama was narayana!

and in the third janma, shishupala - dantavakra's mother knew beforehand that krishna would kill her sons. hence right from their birth, shishupala-dantavakra knew the stories (krishna leela) of the lord.

with each janma, god makes his devotees know more about him and since devotees are dear to him, he wants to take the devotees back to vaikuntha soon - is what is the moral of the story.

and we mortals are busy fighting and killing people here over petty issues. purandara dasa said, allide nammane...illi bande summane. yenikke? remote control beku antha jagala aadakke.
shame on us.

nags said...


Your comment is very good. Thanks for some good information.

praneshachar said...

a great post it is true to accept death of a single in a family is very difficult and alas 7 at a time it is really pathetic even if you don't know any of them or their kith and kin still you feel so sad when you read them in newspapers or see them on TV.
lefe is like that no one can say that I will live for ever but as rightly said in this short span people will aspire so much fight for so many things looks very odd
but it is reality.
It is said all freinds and relatives must see the people in suffering and give them solace and moral support when they are in distress. our customs will put certian requirements that you must visit the house of dead and talk to them this all I think is with an idea to see that in the initial period of shock they are not left high and dry so that slowly they limp back to life. no body can take the suffering from any one but certianly you can assure tham they are not alone and so many people are with them.
people should learn lessons from such tragedies and do more construcitve work and make everybody life much easier rather than creating trouble etc.,
let god give strength to the kith and kin of the 7 people who lost their lives in a mishp under tragic circumstances. We all pray for RIP of all the departed souls
Let the family of P and all connected with the dead get strength to bear the huge loss and continue the like
god give them strength that's all

Veena Shivanna said...

Abba, entha tragic incident, obbara saavanne taDiyok eshtu kashTa anthadralli 7 jana...!
jeevanadalli vairagya band biDatte ashTe.
Jeevan priyathe manushyana baaLinallinna mukhya uddesha aagirbeku nija..

silkboard said...

Sorry for a digressionary non-spiritual comment Shark. But each such news of road 'accident' makes me angry and frustrated. We accept these deaths as 'sudden' or 'unplanned', may be these are. But we lose far too many near and dear ones on the road.

Ashish said...

This is a pretty sad post. Whenever I read about such incidents, it is very difficult to actually visualize what the family has to go through; what one feels is that we should spend more time with friends and family members

Aberrant said...

thats so sadd...
my condolences...

Anonymous said...

true.. I guess that is why a near-death experience totally changes (for the good) one's focus/priorities/outlook, isnt it?


Anonymous said...

you are weird.

Kavi said...

All well...Long time..?

bellur said...

out of town with P?

shark said...

@nags: I am so sorry.. please accept my condolences. May God give you strength to overcome this hour of grief.

@kavi: Thanks :)

@bellur: You have such amazing stories to tell...:) Thanks for sharing this one.
"allide nammane...illi bande summane" - what more can be said!

@praneshachar: Thanks for all thoe soothing words. To be frank even now it seems they cry every day. Such wounds don't heel so easily right?

@veena: You have put a comment after I asked you to :P
but your words are very true!

@silkboard: Couldn't agree with your more! And sometimes we pay for others mistakes!!!!

@ashish: You said it! our family needs more of our time...

@aberrant: where were you all these days? and yes it's too sad :(

@pavan: I don't think the focus always changes for the good. I am not sure the family members are thinking as positively as I am.. about enjoying the life we have. They have lost complete faith in God and their state is horrible :(

@anon : Thanks for the compliments :P

@kavi and bellur : Not majorly out of town.. just got too busy in office and also our usual mysore trips ;-)
now back after a good project release :D

praneshachar said...

Agree these things will not heel so easily and time is the healer such a big tragedy it will be very difficult to overcome. by sitting out here itself we all feel then imagine the plight of the immediate family who is to console whom?
only thing we can wish is let them come out of this at the earliest loss is loss no one can make good but we have to go on life is like that

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