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Yes! I am confused. I don't know what's happening to me.. I can hardly concentrate on one thing these days...**am I becoming more crazy than I am already?**

I can't do a simple thing as talk-on-the-phone without thinking about something else!!! Come on girls are *supposed* to be experts in gossiping... But I realised lately that I will be speaking to people but something else will be going on in my mind...

I am just unable to read a book at peace.... None! *yes! none* of the books can hold my attention for more than 10 mins.. I get bored!

And for the first time in my life...I FAILED in an exam!!!!!!!!!!!! ***well..yes I have never failed in an exam before... this is not me! no! no! no!****. Today I had gone to take up driving written test and this happened **booohoooo** and the reason? I was thinking about this! Can you believe it? I am supposed to be writing an exam for heavens sake!!!! What's happening to me???

I have henceforth decided that I am not going to read newspaper from tomorrow... It upsets me too much... things take control of me too much... My mind is too much disturbed by the suffering of so many people...

Coming back to that link above... I am disgusted to say the least!!! Purification of a temple because a "woman" touched the god!!

Is it a curse to be born as a woman?

First of all we suffer from so many things.... Except for a fortunate few like me (I should really thank my parents for giving me so many oppurtunities to succeed..never denying me anything that I wanted to do!)... women are treated nothing less than shit.... they are denied education "come on.. what will you do studying? All you have do later is cook and have children why should I waste money making you study" - This was the answer one of our house workers gave to his daughter when she wanted him to send her also to school!!!

Do we have an identity in the first place? Take for instance our names... first it is with my fathers name in it.... and then after I get married... my husbands... where is ME in that? Why can't I have just my name??? I am first somebody's daughter and then Mrs.Somebody... why can't I be called as just ME???hello!!!! anybody listening????

Ok leave that...as somebody said "what's in a name!".

Why has god made us physically like this????? Why do we have to suffer endlessly? Month after month! year after year for atleast 38 years!!! Can somebody imagine that.... 38 years of hardship! pain! Why do we have to go through child birth? Oh shit man! thinking about it makes me shiver with fear! And yet after all this listen to "you are just a woman"!

Greatest joke of the millenium "Indian Army can do without women!!" what kind of a statement is that from a man of such high calibre??????????

A woman is not even allowed to live alone with peace... predators will be waiting to pounce on her... so people end up getting married for "security" (though ultimately they get abused by their beloved husband himself!!). Anyway that's another matter altogether... but why is a "widow" looked upon with scorn and a "widower" with pity????

My heart would bleed everytime when my grandmother was denied "kumkum" when she went to others houses becasue she was a widow... I wept for her... I wept for her... when her name "could-not" be put in any of her childrens' wedding cards because she was a widow.... Is that all a mother gets after getting to raise children all on her own after loosing her husband in an early stage?

My heart was torn to pieces when even her "last-rites" was based on her "widow" status! I hate all this! I hate this to the core!!!!! Was she not a person by herself at all? Was she only somebody's wife??????!!!!!

Why can't people realise the importance of women? Why can't they realise that they could have never come into this world if their mother never had them in her for 9 whole months!

So, finally coming to the dreaded question... WHO AM I?

I am too confused.. I don't know what I am doing? Why am I writing this blog? Why am I feeling miserable being a woman? Why can't I just scream and run away somewhere really far!!!!!

I wish...

* I can stop thinking about some hazaar things... and concentrate on what I am doing currently - I am doing something called as "coding"..which I am sure with this state of my mind will not even pass my own unit test!!!! I will be too confused to find bugs.. leave alone fix them!

* My grandmother was alive... and I could sleep next to her in the night...

* I had not failed this damned test!!!! *crap*

* All men and women are treated equally! In every aspect of life!

* I wish I could say to my father "Don't worry appa, I will take care of you" (Yes. He is very orthodox, he refuses to take even small amount of money from me! For some house renovation... not that he does not have money.. he has plenty of it..**smiles**, but I wanted to have some contribution to my house.... But no! After all I am his "daughter" how can he take money from me *gasp* !!!!)

* I have a son like Calvin :D - who would keep me on my toes... and keep my mind thinking always..;-))

* I wish I can be a dutiful wife... making my husband happy always (I am sure I will never be one! I am too independent and too-much career oriented to do some sacrifices for him!)

* I stop ranting on and on in my blog!

* I get some nice bright and funny ideas to write about (can somebody suggest me something.....please)

* All desi's in America feel proud that they are Indians! (hah! I know this can never ever happen!)

* I could stop writing such stupid posts!

THE END!

I am untouchable even after death!

I wanted to write a very happy post... But some things just don't want to leave me. I can't even turn a blind eye to these issues. For the time being the most I can do is rant about it in my blog! Though this does not help anybody... I see no other way at this time atleast to do something about it. I hope with few people reading my blog atleast the mindset (read hypocrisy) change.

Before continuing reading my blog, please do read this!

Are we so in-human? Can't we even give them a decent burial? First of all they lead such dreadful lives (I refuse to accept that people get into this profession by choice... It's more by force than for pleasure!)

Ok. First things first... Why are they there? Why do they practice prostitution? If there were no "visitors" no-one would have done that! So it's ultimately the same demand-supply principle! People (the so-called normal citizens) demand it... And hence these people are there and practicing it.

So how come they become un-touchables?? *surprise* I really don't want to get into the details but do people simply see them and come and never touch them in those places? Then how come just after coming out of that place they are suddenly not to be even looked at!!!

The society is so full of hypocrites (people... Don't start scolding me that I have something against Indian men now... Please.. I am talking in general.. These kind of people are not "respected" in any part of the world for that matter!).

Now obviously the government can't do anything about it.. Because prostitution is still not legal in India. So, as a responsible society why can't we do something about this?

Now, you have understood me wrong if you think that I am in anyway supporting this trade! This is the most dreadful thing of all! I am sure all these people can find some other jobs to fill their stomach... But that's left to them.. I mean if they want to fall to cheap levels.. It's their wish.

But as someone being a society member... Don't you think it's our own responsibility to give them a chance for atleast a decent burial? Are they asking for too much? After all man... They are dead! What more harm can they cause (assuming they have caused "some-harm" before!)?

*sigh* *double sigh*.. With all these things we are supposed to be the "civilized-species"!!! When we can't even respect fellow specie member... Are we even anywhere close to civilization?

Car.. car... yellnodi car..

****BIG SMILE****

Me and D finally bought a car...:D I am so happy... This is my first "own" car...

Well this is how it looks like, Though this is not the actual one.. Mine is mettalic grayish green in color.

I am happy...happy...happy.....

By the way it's a Dodge Intrepid :D

Why are people ashamed to be Indians?

I am totally irritated today! You can actually make hot pakoras on top of my head, because I am really burning with anger/irritation!!!!

How can people stoop such low levels! Why can't people be satisfied with what they have? Is there no limit to greediness?

OK... I know till now I have made no sense! My mind is not clear! So be sure to endure my blabbering for some more time... (If you can/wish to!)
Oho! Why am I being mad at you readers?? It’s not your fault, it’s somebody else’s altogether!

Let me tell you the story behind my grumpy behavior, so that you can continue to read my blog. Else I am sure you will just close this and go!

Today evening, we (my project team) had gone out for a drink... The company, for which I am doing a project, is one of the most culturally diverse organizations. I mean, you can find people of all countries and cultures here. Needless to say Indians are a majority. So, in our group of 11 people, 3 are Indians, 2 Pakistanis, 1 German, 2 Taiwanese and 3 Americans!
The topic of discussion was obviously… World-cup football :) And though there were "some" inputs from us Indians, I must confess that it was not too much... so after some time, the others realized this, and generally asked us to update on the latest of cricket...

One of the Pakistani in the group commented that “I would easily get a visa to India if there is a cricket match and I have to watch it... But I will never get a Business Visa". He was in-fact right, because he had tried so many times already and was unsuccessful in getting a business visa!

Now here is where Mr. P pitches in... (He is the one whom I am bitching about in case you haven't figured it our already!!) :

"Ha!Ha! Ha! That's so typical of India.. and it's governance! They will NEVER do
anything right! They are always like this! Highly impractical! I appreciate
America! It is so free! I love being here!"

So? what's the big deal? The whole world is not America! I do agree that India is still a long way to go in terms of catching up with the "west".. So what? I am quite happy with how my country is.. and I know that we are improving day by day and one fine day we will also be where America is! (*Think* Though I am not sure if I want it to be this way! *Think*)

If he had stopped at that...maybe I wouldn’t be writing this blog. But obviously since I am writing this.....
Here are some more of Mr. P The Great's statements!

"Thank god I did not fall sick when I went to India for
my vacation this time! "

Hello! 30 years of your life you have lived in India... and now just 5+ years in America makes you fall sick on your visit to India???!!!

"Oh India is a BIG MESS!!! Total Chaos! God only knows
what’s happening out there!"

So what's your problem? anyway you are blissfully sitting here and bitching about it na.. how does it affect you **grrrrrr**

"Oh My! The pollution levels are so dreadfully high! You can almost choke to death there!"

Oh is it?!! Then how come you are still alive!) : I guess he does not know where exactly the ozone layer in thinner and depleting! Can I hope he reads this!

"There is a saying "Men should earn in dollars, drive German Cars, eat Chinese Food but Marry an
INDIAN WOMAN" "

Ha-ha! ha! - Now it's time for me to laugh!! Why Indian women?? I know... What better bakras can you get whom you can tame and make her dance according to your whims and fancies! Western women will obviously not listen to anything and everything that you say!

I am too upset to carry on now... I will update with more "Gyan" from this great fellow tomorrow...

Maybe I would have cooled down by tomorrow and award him a Nobel prize who knows:-/!!!

June-16-2006: Since I am updating this blog with more of his sayings, it obviously means I haven't cooled down yet.. Does anybody have ICE???

Again the pakistani said "I keep thinking that Pakistan is fighting a loosing war.. India is atleast 5 times bigger and definitely more powerful. We have no chance!"

THE Response:

"Awww come on... India can't win
anything! It's a totally crappy system out there. By the
time they get
an
approval for backfire, the war would be over! Ha! Ha! Ha"

Hello! Knock Knock... has anyone heard about Kargil? and what happened in that? I am NOT for war! I pray to god every day that we end this stupid war and just live like neighbors. But was it necessary to demean your country like that!

If I go on... the list is endless and truly speaking I am bored to even write everything! I was too tongue-tied to say anything out there! What can you say when somebody from your own country is speaking like this! I mean, if somebody else was speaking this way, then you always tell them that that's not the case always and we are good in our own way!

I do agree that India :

1. Does not have computerised systems everywhere!
2. Does not even have proper roads in the cities leave alone freeways!
3. We get work from "other" countries and live on the "pay" that "they" give!

All this said and done.. I LOVE MY COUNTRY! We are like this today because :

1. We were constantly fighting wars against n number of "intruders". First came the Mughals, then came Portugese, Dutch and then English! Who can "remain" rich in such situations? The English not only ruled us, but looted us for 100 years! That surely is not a short span of time!
2. We are country with the greatest cultural diversity! Any development should heed and adhere to all "kinds" of people, which obviosuly is not an easy task
3. We don't exactly have "freindly" neighbors. There is constant fear of war... and hence we keep investing in military!

But we are progressing against all these odds! And it's a common man's guess that it's not an easy task! IT was unheard of 10 years ago... and now see where we are! We are now recognised as "skilled labour" rather than "cheap labour"!!!!!

K. I will stop it here! I don't want to spoil my mood further by constantly thinking about him and writing about him!

Lifecycle Rewinded!!!

Can't agree with him more!

My 2+ cents:

* Death is anyway inevitable - But why spoil "Life" worrying about death? It WILL happen someday or other. Make the most of all the days you have now!

* Million (or zillion... or whatever is highest!!) dollar question.....where will I be after I die??????
Will I be able to look at earth in a top level view? See everybody who I care for (or even hate for that matter!)?

* Will I be remembered after, say 10 years of my death? Is anybody really going to miss me?

* Why am I here in the first place? Do I have a mission to complete? If yes, will somebody please let me know what is that???? :-/

* Why is there a lifecycle in the first place? Why are we born.. and then grown and then dead?? What purpose does it serve?

I am thouroughly confused! :( What's the point of all this? What;s the point in making earth so hi-tech? Who is benifitting from all this?

When I am 40...

OK. I was having a discussion (more of a timepass kind you can say!) with my manager yesterday. He was quite surprised when he came to know that I am just 26! He said he hadn't even "thought" about working at that age! He was generally loafing around .. Living on meager allowances from his otherwise very rich father, dating different women each day. He also agreed blondes are the best ;-)!
He was in some-kind-of job.. He can't even remember what it was now! He said he was "over-enthusiastic" to finish everything in half the time!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Just to give you an insight.. We had (initially) planned for a release on June 5th. Till last Wednesday I did not even have the access to run my code on the production servers!. No points for guessing that I was tensed to the core. I was pestering anybody and everybody whom I could find in office to let me know what I can do to go forward! I also did not have the details of the data that was "supposed" to be migrated! So you can imagine my state! What the hell! How could I do a release in such a situation in 3 days!!!!
People who generally smile at me also would run away from me as fast as they can.. For the fear that I will ask them next! Or atleast nail them down to listen to my pathetic tension filled tale :-/

So finally a meeting was called on Thursday to discuss about the same with "this" manager. The first 30 minutes we figured out what to do next and all... Then started the "timepass". Now back to the story!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now, that you had the "insight" - he was telling me not to get tensed about these "stupid" (in his own words!) release dates! He said dates can always be shifted - as if the sky is not going to fall on our heads if we don't give the software on a particular day! Big deal!
This was how he was speaking, and all along I was just smiling... Not knowing what to say or how to respond!

Then, he asked me what all "interesting" things have I done in my life till now?
The typical traditional-south Indian-brahmin girl that I am.. I told him

* I have had a good education! Enjoyed my college life with lots of friends
* Have had quite a good career - have enjoyed my work till date
* Traveled a lot! - Paris, Germany, Now US!
* Have a boy-friend *ahem* *blush*

My! Was I happy after saying this :D

His reaction: Is that all you can say which is "interesting"?

*puff* *puff* All my "happiness" gone!

He said : You have been a very good girl.. You should have been bad also at times! Should have done something wild!
Did he mean? ....Running away from the house! Got drugged somewhere! Got lost in some third world country! And even after all this if I am still alive and the cannibals of Africa have not savored me.. I should have gone back home????

He was all the more disappointed when he came to know that I don't "live" with my boy-friend in India! Then what;s the use of having a boy-friend he asks! What was I supposed to answer?????
Oh You should have seen the surprise on his face when I said that I am going to "marry" this same boy friend and I haven;t had any others before!
I strongly feel, he was feeling very sad for me that I have;t tried the rest of the male species! ;-)

He says finally "You know why I am asking you all this? I am 45 now.. But when I think back, I am very happy that I have done everything in my life. Whether they are good or bad. I have experienced everything. I tell this to the youth of today also, that they should go out.. Explore the world! And When they are 40 something they can look back at themselves and smile and feel happy that they have "actually" experienced Life!"

A very sweet guy!

Now, I am very far from being 40.. So the "thinking back" is also very far away ;-)
But this conversation has made me think how I would be when I am 40!

1) I would be tired, overweight and not to mention OLD!.... some incentives of that might be Diabetes and Arthritis to say the least!

2) Would have 2 kids (any gender does not matter!) who are extremely brattish! Doesn't even care to listen to my requests! Leave alone orders!

3) An extremely sexy *smiles* husband who is the greatest "attraction" for the neighborhood girl next door (just turned 18 and living alone! God help me!) who gives a "sympathetic look" to my husband whenever "we" have a fight and he walks out of the house for a long walk!

4) I have a strong doubt that my husband is having an affair with his super hot secretary! (Come on! I could smell "her" perfume many times near him.. Or wait a sec.. Was it mine **????**)

5) Now just to make my husband feel J.. I purposely spoil my kitchen sink by putting all the waste in the kitchen and call the "Plumber" atleast 3 times a week! (who is known in the area as "THE GUY" who has layed most of the sexy housewives ;-)) But unfortunately he is not even remotely interested in me... Why? Read Point No 1 again :P

**shudder** **shudder** It does not look too rosy does it?
So I am going to make the most of my life while I can... And NOW is the best time.

LO and BEHOLD! BEWARE WORLD... HERE I COME TO MAKE THE MOST OF YOU !!! **muhaah ha ha **

Lost

I didn't want to put up a new post till I had enough answers for my previous one.
So my dear bloggers.. please do reply to me previous post as well... even after reading this..:)
I could not resist myself after seeing this picture....



This is again my Mysore office..:) This building is one of the food courts that we have. Oh my! what a beautiful sight...:D Sunset at it's best.

Some of the the thoughts that crossed my mind after seeing this...

Lost -- somewhere between sunrise and sunset, two golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes; no reward is offered, for they are gone forever." ~Smiles~

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. - Anne Frank

Time and Love

Does love for someone change with time?
This is the question that's haunting me for quite some time now....

Case 1:
My friend. Happily married for 2 years. Arranged marraige. In-laws are great! Living in a joint family where other women (SILs)are housewives. She gets to be the most cared for female in the house, because she goes out for work. Everything working fine and fantastic. Husband is also great! well settled..caring etc etc.
Commuting time is too much (Thanks to the terrible traffic jams!!). Decided to live in a house separately near to office. Everything fine for an year. But suddenly one fine day felt that Husband is not trustworthy.. tells lots of lies (small ones yaar! not extra marital affair kinds!!). So.... LEFT HIM! After a year now, divorce is also got. Legally separated.

Case 2:
Again my friend. Happily married for 4 years. Love marraige. Everything is going on smooth.. not much of parents support ( or interference), because they married going against them. So, both are just happy with themselves. Wife starts to grow in her career.. starts to earn more than HIM. Trouble starts.. he easily finds a chance to tell her sarcastically that she is "acting" like this because she earns more. She is also equally adamant.. says if that is the case, why can't he improve himself and earn more than her? In between all this hara kiri.. they have a child also. Things kind of cools down after this, the point of attention changes. BUT after a year... things are back where they left.... Now, both are emotionally strained souls. You have to "search" for happiness in their lives. There is still love somewhere..and hence they have not yet thought of divorce... but they just decide to spend more time apart than together.

Is this what life is? I wonder...

My basic reasoning.. when we can love our parents, siblings unconditionally (Though we might not agree with whatever they say!). Why can't we love our partners also like that? We all know that nobody is perfect.. everybody have their own +s and -s. Why can't we accept our partners also just as they are! Why does when it comes to partners "we want them to be how WE want them to be"?
If my father didn't buy me what I wanted.. I would surely cry and hoot and make a big hullah.. but then that would be max for 1 day... after that it's back to normal.
I never expected my parents to give me a "surprise" on my birthday... actually never ever "celebrated" in the house on my birthday for that matter.

But in the same situation, if you replace "father" with "husband" why does the husband become bad? Why do we think that his love for me is fading... that;s why he does all this to me? WHY?

Why does the so called love for your partner fade away after some time? I know there are lots of success stories as well.. where people are happily married for 30 years..:) I am right now talking about the failed ones!

And that too when things we "actually" nice.. if it was a terrible mistake from the beginning then that's a different issue.
Why do people just decide after 3-4 years of happy marraige that their partners are no longer "compatible"??????

Deep Blue Sea

This is the movie which came to my mind first when I saw the brochure of "Dallas World Aquarium". It boasted of big sharks, large fish tanks world's largest infact..;-)!
With my expectations set that high.. I was kind of dissapointed after seeing the so called "big" building. But in any case went inside. We were welcomed by 4 cute penguins, but felt sad because they were kind of imprisoned in a glass case..:(

Further inside there was an artificial forest setting. Not very natural.. but very well set.
The whole aquarium is well maintained. There aren't too many species or anything, but whatever was there was very nice and colorful.:)



The welcoming view of the forest

I will not go into the details of each and everything that I saw there! It's too boring to write.. and I am sure it's all the more boring to read it..:D

Some of the snaps.. please note the captions for them.



This one reminds me of my sister... peacefully sleeping;-))




This one was really huge.. Guess more because of the magnifying glass!



Looks like they have faught. Must be husband and wife..;-)

The best part of this place was the "Mayan Dance". It seems most of the artifacts that were displayed here belonged to the Mayans.
There was a performance from the "Mayans" in this place. It was cool.. the music was great.. foot tapping kinds. They kind of played with the fire also.:)
One of the snaps is below.. can't put any more as it has me in that...:D

Love you Amma

With all this mother's day celebrations going on around me, I can't stop myself thinking about my mom....
She's the best mom anyone can ever have. I know, all of us say the same... but that does not make any of our moms less special.
I can hardly think of a day when she did something for herself. She always thought about us first and then herself.
I don't remember thanking her anytime for all that she has done to us (me and my sister). She was a career woman, headmistress in a high school. But we never had a nanny or anybody.. she always found time to take care of us. We were also studying in her school which was kind of an advantage...:) (For us more... becasue we could get away from the boys bullying us... after all we were the head madam's daughters..;-)))

As a dutiful wife

She was or rather still is a very dutiful wife. Never did anything against my fathers wishes. Infact when my father got transferred to a different place, she just resigned her job! just like that...so that we could relocate.
I know I will never do such a thing so easily..;-) I will make sure my husband has a tough time re-locating..;-)

She is lovable... sociable...

She is always so good with my friends, she knows exactly what to talk with whom...:D
For that matter she is so good with everybody, from a 2 year toddler to an 80 year old woman, she can socialize with anybody and everybody.
Her extra curricular activities are just endless! she is a writer.. writes novels, articles etc. Does creative embriodery and tailoring. Sings beautifully:)
Cooking.. my father always preffered more than one dish for lunch/dinner.. so we always had variety! Then after my father had a open heart surgery, his diet was kind of low oil, low spice .. so there was all the more variety... one set for him,.... and one set for us...:)

She is an epitome of courage

My father's illness reminds me how courageous she was during that whole thing.
It was the greatest test of her courage. My father had a very sudden heart attack, and he was to be operated immediately. She handled everything single handedly.. and never let us get scared.... she wore that smile on her face always when she was to see us.. she made sure everything was proper in the house also....
She always encouraged me in whatever i did... was with me in whatever i was interested in.. music dance.. everything.
Sometime my father was a bit upset about me spending too much of my time in dance class rather than studying... we used to have heated arguments for that.. but my mom always supported me... never ever let me down. She was the only person who had confidence in me, that I would do both...
She never even thought twice for sacrificing her "needs" for our "wants".

She taught me great lessons

She taught me to be artistic in life. She taught me to be independent. She taught me how to behave in public. She taught me to respect elders. She taught me music. She taught me appreciate small pleasures in life. She taught me how to love somebody unconditionally. She taught me that family comes first above everything. She taught me life is not about goods and bads, it's about your attitude. She taught me to pray, to beleive in God.

Amma... I really love you... very very much. I would love to see you happy at all times. I hope I can be the ideal daughter you want me to be one day....:)

Tip Tip Barsa Paani....

Wow! This is how our office campus looked like last week when there was a hailstorm..:) I guess this was the first ever hailstorm the city saw.. such a heavy one I mean.

The city is known for it's hot weather, and now with all that ice.. it looks like it snowed.. what a beautiful sight...:)

"Proper" Attrire for women!

Whenever anybody says "formal" attrire for women.. what does that mean?

For men, I guess it is more or less well defined! Full armed shirts, pants and tie (Balzer, in case the envi is "too" formal) and shoes.

So now, how do we define it for women? Specially Indian women?

Now, here's the set of rules...

1. No "sleeve-less" dressses or tops
2. No half/mega sleeved tops!
3. No "tight" fitting clothes (I wonder who can define what is tight and loose.. the one wearing it or the one seeing?)
4. No wrap around skirts
5. No "transparent" chudidars (how do you define or measure the transperency???)
6. Saree: Please tie in such a way that it does not show any parts of the body which are not be shown. Pleated pallus preffered!!!
7. ONLY 3/4th full sleeved shirts on troushers!!! (In this summer???)
8. Duppattas are to be worn to "serve the purpose"!


So, in a work place (with formal environment).. you are "supposed" to wear something which adheres to "all" of these rules.

But the question is.. should somebody tell people what to wear and what not to wear? If you are a office goer... well you would be atleast 21+. This means you kind of know what is ok to wear... to office... and what is not-ok!! If on top of this, some people choose to wear in-appropriate dress, wouldn't it be better to just "educate" them individually? rather than making a book of rules for everybody!

Now, the whole context of my post is women's attire, so if a lady chooses to wear in appropriate clothes.. she is doing it at her own risk.. inviting trouble.

We are not some school kids right? wherein there used to be a nail leader (who checks the cleanliness of nails!), ribbon leader, bench leader..what not!

Anyway all said and done, rules are rules. When imposed are to be followed! This I agree completely.

Now, in any educated society, when somebody says something, it is questioned for it's motive. So this "attrire definition" should also questioned.

My questioning goes like this... Please note I am talking in the context of Indian women.

Do women in the so called western countries dress this way? Do they cover themselves from head to toe!!??? DOn't they get respect from their colleagues?

Well... people say those are western countries.. and we are in India.. so things are different like many other things. Fine agreed.

But then one of the comments for this issue, by an "educated Indian male"... has made me burn wild with anger...
just read it.. in His hown words...


"There is lot of difference between exposure of males' body and exposure of female's body ( especially in a country like India where more respect is given to women).

So the directive of avoiding sleeveless for women is introduced, i think the reason may be to cover woman's beauty(in this case arms).

That is good idea, following cultural traditions..............."


WOW!! what a statement!
I am shocked beyond words after reading this!! If an educated well placed individual can speak like this... what more can i expect from a common man?????

Please excuse me? "cover the beauty?" in arms? my god! I am laughing to splits here...... Even if you chose to show off your beauty.. what's wrong? What is beauty for? oh ya! i forgot!!! it's only for your husband to see right??? miserable me! how can i even think beyond that!

I am sure if given a choice he would ask his mother/sister/wife to go out ONLY in burkha!!!! I thought world over people are encouraging women to come out of the burkha and lo and behold just around me...:((((((

So now, my thought goes something like this....
Does attrire really matter? Of course I do not deny the fact that you cannot come to office in your night dress just becasue it does not matter! But do we really need to have "rules" and "regulations" and that too so-outdated?

There are quite a few companies which actually allow people to come to work in shorts! nobody cares!

If you are a programmer... and from morning till night all you do is sit in front of the computer and code... with some occational (once a week) team meetings.. do you really have to dress up so much?

It makes sense to maybe the HR/management team who interact with people specially outsiders. It makes sense for them to dress formally.

My point is not even formal/informal attire.. it's for the point that somebody tells you not to wear sleeveless/half sleeved shirts!! The reason behind it... well it does not create a "good" work environment... and to be more specific "men will be distracted"..;-))

Is the so called "evil" present in the woman's body (that too hands for christ's sake!!! don't men have hands????)) or is it in the man's mind?????

Why is it that in western countries women wear mini skirts and blouses showing off their cleavage.. no-body even gives an absurd second glance? And in India why is it that a man is ready to pounce on you.. for a simple thing as give him a glance?

So does it prove that it's the mind that is corruped and not the body (woman's)!!!!!

And coming back to the point of this guy who said: "especially in a country like India where more respect is given to women"

how true!!!!
1. we have the lowest sex ratio
2. We have the highest number of child rapes recorded!
3. Even elderly widows are not left at peace....
4. Call center females are getting brutally murdered!
5. Women are forced to marry men of their parent's choice!
6. Highest prostitution!
7. In some village in rajastan.. the sex ratio is so low.. one woman is "shared" between more than 3 men! ofcourse for money!!!!!
8. How many times you are "hit" in the wrong places when you go on road, when you are in the bus, when you are in a crowded place?
9. Even in the metropolitan cities, abortions are carried out after knowing that it's going to be a female child!
10. In villages female children are killed just after birth by putting in a rice grain in the mouth with milk!


All this and we say, women are like godesses!! cut the crap man! I have seen women respected much much more in countries where they don't even have a culture of their own!!

When are we ever going to change our mind set?
When are we going to accept women as something more than an object of pleasure?
When are we going to respect women as human beings and not some curved creatures?
When are we ever going to look beyond a woman's body... understand her feelings, respect her sentiments?

How would men feel... if every woman who passes by them, "scrutinizes" them from top to bottom? and pass absurd comments?

Why is it always that a woman should change? why can't the thinking of men change? hmmmmm i know, I am asking for too much here.. it's not such an easy thing!

I wonder when will we ever get Independence as Mahatma Gandhi dreamed of ..." India would "actually" be independent when women can roam around at 12 in the night fearlessly on the streets"....

How he did not realise that it's too far fethced a dream to come true... with our mentality!

A sad day in a woman's life.

I loved this....

Two guys meet in a bar, and one says to the other, "Did you hear the news? -- Paul's dead!" "What!?! Paul is dead? What happened to him?" "Well, he was on his way over to my house the other day and just as he arrived, he hit the gas instead of the brake, and boom -- the car hit the curb and flipped up and he crashed through the sunroof -- went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."

"Oh, God, what a horrible way to die!"
"No, no, he survived that; that didn't kill him at all. So, he landed in my upstairs bedroom and he was all covered in broken glass on the floor, with a broken leg. He spotted the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reached up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He was just dragging himself up when bang, the massive wardrobe came crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."

"That's terrible! What an awful way to die!"
"No, no, that didn't kill him; he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawled out onto the landing; he tried to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister broke and he fell off he landing. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spun and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him!"

"Oh, my God, what a way to die!"
"Well, that didn't actually kill him either, he even survived that. So he was on the downstairs anding, just beside the kitchen. He crawled in to the kitchen, tried to pull himself up on the stove, but grabbed a big pot of boiling water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him."

"Man, that's got to hurt! To burn to death!"
"Yes, I'm sure it would, but he survived that! He was lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spotted the wall phone and tried to pull himself up to call for help, but instead he grabbed the light switch and pulled the whole thing off the wall, and, of course, the water and electricity didn't mix and he got electrocuted, wallop,

240 volts shot through him!"

"That killed him, though, right?"
"Well, no, he survived that, he ..."
"Hold on, just how did Paul die, then?"

"Well, I shot him!"

"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"

"I had to. He was wrecking my whole house!"

Psuedo Secularism

Consider two incidents:

Incident 1: May 01 2006: Violence in Kashmir leaves 35 people dead!

Some militants disguised as soldiers and gunned down 35 kashmir's hindu minority people in a small village.

Mr.Prime Ministers reaction: Kashmir's people have always been brave.. they have always protested militancy!

Is that all you expect from your prime minister for such a gruesome killing?????? what crap! how can you justify the killings by just terming the people brave!! poor soles what could they have done except getting killed!!!!!

I have a colleauge who is a Kashmiri pandit... and you can see the pain in her eyes everytime she narrates how they "ran" away from kashmir... which was once termed as "Paradise on earth"...:(

No further action was taken.. oh ya! how can you track down militants? how can you find them? you can't find them right!!! :-/

Leave alone the government, where are those human right watchdogs & where are those leftist liberals ?

This was not the first mass killing or anything... this has been happening for ever!!! But still our watchdogs are just mute spectators!!

Incident 2: May 03 2006 (not very sure of the date): Vadodara: Man burnt alive!

Now supposedly this man was from a minority muslim community....

Lo and behold! there is so much of violence in vadodara becasue of this! a complete communal violence has started and the situation is out of control of the police!

Extra troups are being brought in!

Now... that is fast action!!!:)

Though I express my sympathies to "all" those who are killed in such acts... but then one question really makes me think... is a life of 1 person more valuable than the lives of 35 people? or is it just because he is from a minority community?

Sometimes i really wonder... do hindus in India.. supposedly their "own" mother land... live happily? Are they really enjoying the "majority" status?

I am not against any religion... but then i can't help myself wondering... is being a Hindu Brahmin a crime????
If somebody kills you... nobody (read government) bothers about it... If you want to have a good education... well "reservation" does not let you do it!
Where do we stand? where do we "belong"???


It's time we rose up against this!!! we are too soft... not really seeing the enormity of the trend.....
But then the million dollar question is... HOW DO I DO IT??????

My first weekend in US

I have started driving car in US...:) I know it's not a big thing.. but then.. my colleague is also a freak on cars just like me...:) so he gets a new rental car every week...;-) so now i have driven 2 cars, one chevrolet and another stratus. I am getting to know all the american models.. there sure is a lot of variety!!

When I was in germany.... though I must admit I never actually analysed or looked at them very closely... 'coz I never felt the need for a car...:) I did not notice too many models...
But then, here every car is a different model... and I like variety..:D

I had started driving to work from last thrusday.. but then on saturday I went on the freeway for the first time...
and all along the only thing i could think of was... when will my India become like this...:-/

We had been to the airport to drop off a colleague, as he was returning back to India. We came back from there... went to some place (I don't remember the name right now!) to have lunch... and as usual nothing vegetarian avialable.. finally ordered for something sutom without meat... without fish!

Later on we went for a movie... there is something called a dollar theater here.. you get to watch a movie for 1 dollar...:D watched "Aquamarine". It was a cute and funny movie.. watchable once...:)

Went to a half price book shop... now that is the place I would love to be in...:) bought some books... some authors which I have never heard of before...;-) but thought will give it a try...

And finally as usual went to an Indian stores to do some weekly Indian items shopping, ended up renting a Tamil moview DVD....:)

Came back home.... had dinner and watched the movie...:) the movie was nothing fantastic though!

Sunday: Cleaning and general loafing around . My sister had warned me NOT to clean the house... she said some people might not like it clean...!!! and here I share my appartment with other people... but then i just could not control... so I thouroughly cleaned my spacious bathroom... and the kitchen...:D kind of "re-arranged" the stuff in the living room... Anyway after this weekend I will be alone in this appartment for some 3 weeks... that time i will make it spic and span...:D

Sunday went to return back the dvd... and ended up renting a kannada movie this time...:) some old Anant Nag movie...:d rellay funny it is.. haven't watched it fully... we have been watching just 20 mins at a time... so we are just half way thru the movie right now...:)

Well that was my first weekend in US. Nothing fantastic about it.. but then after a looooooooong time i got some time for myself... This is the best part of being onsite.. you can just be alone when you want to...:D:D:D

Media....... what's your idea?

Few days back.. one of our former ministers.. Mr.Pramod Mahajan was shot by his brother. No! he did not die... he had some minor injuries.
Now All my sympathies to him.. becasue his own brother shot at him (not that these kind of sibling enemity is new here!).
But the most amazing part is that almost "all" the news channels covered this for almost one full day! I mean come on.... so many people get killed in so many awful ways... they don't even deserve a mention in the local news paper... but this guy gets a full day coverage?
Oh My! you should have seen the "analysis".. the "reports"... the astrological predictions! the prayers! what not! grossly over exaggerated!!

I wonder where are we heading...:-/

Tissue on a croton :

I have no idea from when did my father become so superstitious.
Though he was always kind of orthodox as long as I can remember.
Actually he is some what weird.. In some cases he is too forward thinking and in some cases he is too backward.. But whatever the case might be.... Now the below incident will prove the later..:)

It was the day I was to travel to US. Now.. That day seems to be really eventful..:) My last post was also on that...:D

My father had to travel to bangalore early in the morning... So here goes the "instructions" for me the previous night..

" Tomorrow, it is ekaadashi with shatabisha nakshatra.. Which is not very good for you to travel... So do as I say!"

Next day morning...

Got up at 6... Had head bath.. Did pooja for God.. Lit the lamp that too Nandaaa Deepa (The one which burns thru the day) mind you!

Now comes the funny part... Since the "bad" time was starting at 11:30.. I had to tie a hand kerchief to a tree outside the house..:)
Now where in the world do I bring a kerchief? I guess the last one I had was in my 10th class!
The closest equivalent of a kerchief that I could think of was a tissue..:) So I went ahead and tied that only to the tree,,, I felt so silly/funny doing that...

the story does not end there.. I had to carry the same one with me all thru my travel. Now the best part was taking out the paper tissue out of the knot from the tree.. Obviously I am not "supposed" to tear it or anything. But then all "supposed" things don't happen as required.. So I ended up tearing it a little bit...:)
But somehow (should I say miraculously?) I reached Dallas in "one" piece..;-) even though my "protector" was torn into bits by the time I reached here...:D:D:D:D

Tiring!!!!!

Last weekend... ooofffff! it was so tiring....
I was supposed to fly to U.S on moday early morning...
I had to get a laptop from my company for this visit. I had asked for it on last monday only... but they didn't have stock and hence gave me only on friday afternoon at 3:30!!! it was terribly late to install stuff and transfer all the necessary data... But then I had no choice.:(
But then as soon as I opened the laptop.. the first problem was that it didn;t connect to the LAN... so couldn't log in with my id. Then couldn't contact the CCD guys (as if they had expected this would happen and ran away from my reach!)
I had shouted at them before only for delaying so much to give me one.

Somehow contacted some global support desk and tried to rectify that.. but to no use... :( tried so hard but no use at all....

And on top of that I had planned to leave early because I had to shop! I didn;t have clothes to wear.. All the western formals which I had no longer fit me..:( and they have become so old also!!!

So finally contacted some guys in mysore who said they would help me rectify the laptop and hence left from my bangalore office.
Finally found some clothes also...(before there were some 3 unsucessfull attempts at finding clothes... if the design matched my taste the size was not there... and if they had the size I did not like the design!) sometimes i wonder why they make such small clothes!!! they want everybody to starve to death or what to fit in to those clothes!!! what do I know!!!

Anyway finished the shopping on friday and did all the packing for the things already available in bangalore.
Went to Mysore on saturday... and all my plans got changed becasue i had to go to office to get that laptop rectified!! so full day went off in that only....:(
In the evening rushed thru the other things like doctor visit and some chota mota stuff to be bought...

Sunday, there was a function.. my BFs sisters engagement. I had to go and dress her up. Left early in the morning... and came back home only at 3 home... and guess when was my train back to bangalore? at 3:45!!! so just rushed thru it. Did some last moment packing and all... and literally ran in the railway staionm to ctach the train!
Thank god I didn't have to run all the way from home...;-) my cousin dropped us by car!
Then came to my bangalore home at some 8 in the night.. and had to leave again at 9:30 to the airport..:(
By now my head was aching terribly becasue of too much strain and lack of sleep.ALmost the whole of last week I hadn't slept properly:(

Checkin and all happened smoothly at the airport.. can you believe.. my baggage weight was less than the (much much less than in fact!!) allowable limit..:D:D:D
Guess this is the first time in my life that I have travelled so light weight.
This maybe because I had to carry almost the same things to germany and i had to adjustr within 25kilos... and now i had almost double allowable limit..:)

The journey was too boring... there were no inidvidual TVs... and they were playing some crap movie in the main screen.. I got bored of the novel that I was reading... didn't get sleep also!!! oh god!!! it's worst to just sit and stare at nothing!

Finally reached Dallas on monday afternoon...:)
Now having a terrible jet lag.. I get all sleepy at the wrong times!!!
Hopefully in another 2/3 days i should be fine.

Now also I am wide awake and it's almost 12:30 in the night...:( but if I don't sleeep now.. I am sure to fall off from my seat tomorrow;-)))

Surprise Visitors in My office Campus

Last Monday... early morning.. I just got down from the office bus outside the campus and was walking towards the gate when I suddenly saw that there was a crowd gathered under a tree and everybody is watching something....

Now that's a very rare sight in our office.. where everybody just goes on with his/her business without bothering about others...

Curiosity led me also there... and lo and behold! what a pleasant sight...:) Some cute migratory birds.

I came to know later on that these were called as Rosy Starlings. A mixture of squeaks and rattles.. pink body... legs, bill and glossy black hood and ofcourse patches below...

The red berries in the campus had attracted them :D

Finally I found a good thing about having such a huge campus... we get to see some cute surprise visitors.:)

Granted!

Nice thought!

But I realise I am always taken for granted... why is that?

It is taken for granted by my sis that I am the one who is supposed to cook and clean the house. Her job is only to wash vessels and that's it! nothing this side or that side. Last two days I have been having late night telecons and hence she is supposed to cook in the house (only maagi that too..) but then, when I go home she is totally pissed that I am not doing anything and she is the one doing everything (what? for 2 days!!!). K I forgive her because she is still young... and also she is very sweet other times.. I really Love her...:) and I also know that she is not very much inclined toward house keeping. That's ok.

It is also taken for granted that I am the one who is supposed to do all the socialising with my BF's family. If I don't make a phone call for some 15 days to his sisters I have to be prepared to hear complaints that I have become very busy and don;t call up people! why is it that they don't call? Why is it always have to be me?

Office... I am always "expected" to finish all the work... others have all the commitments in the world! and can't do it... but me... oh come on... I can do it! anything and everything!

Home... taken for granted that I will always listen to my parents. Will never let them down (even if something hurts me terribly! I have to make sure I live up to their expectations!)

Friends... Taken for granted that I am always the one who is supposed to call and keep in touch... else I am no longer a good friend.

It hurts when there is no place for what you feel... when your presence is no longer aknowledged. Its assumed that you will anyways be there... So when you are actually there it's nothing great!

I am really a big dumbo! I never realised this until now... Only after seeing this picture I realised!
I have successfully taken myself for granted :P